Archie!

Grease Monkeys is currently on Hulu, at least in the USA anyway.  And obviously, the best thing about it is the goddess Archie Panjabi.

And don't forget, White Teeth with Archie and a host of others is on Hulu and Netflix.  Catch her while you can.  Me, I can't get enough of her.

A Monkey Movie Report

Meek's Cutoff is beautifully shot, well acted piece of unrelentingly bleak cinema.

This film tells the story of a group of settlers on the Oregon trail who lost their way and who just about have lost their will to keep going. Wagons break down, water runs short, members of their party start to falter, native Americans dog their wake, and yet they keep going even though some of them want to give up and turn back east.

The performances in this film are all quite good. Michelle Williams as the young wife of one of the leaders of the party is quite effecting. Her quiet resolve and resignation is tempered with a cautious optimism that's borne of necessity rather than belief, things can't get worse so they have to get better and soon is what her character must be thinking. Bruce Greenwood, hiding behind a wild and wooly beard and hairdo, is the vainglorious know it all scout who may be leading the party to their doom, it's his best role in years. Shirley Henderson, my Scottish adopted actor, see the side bar on this blog, is in this film and she's eerily good too. She was also another moody western a few years back if you remember, that film as called The Claim. And finally Rod Rondeaux as the Indian who is literally roped into going with the settlers party is also very good.

I recommend this film but be warned it's bleak and it has one of those endings that may unsettle some.

It's a double dose of Archie

Hubba hubba!

Monkey movie reviews times three

Cute, funny movie about a guy, played by Paul Rudd, who has no real guy friends so he sets out to make some before his wedding. His fiancee is played by the oh so cute Rashida Jones.

This movie is in the Judd Apatow school of film comedy but it's not as raunchy as an Apatow movie, but it's still too adult for the young ones. It's chock full of funny performances. Rudd, Jones, and Jason Segel shine in the starring roles. And all the supporting players bring the funny as well.

Recommended.
I saw this one 'On Demand' the other night and I'll admit I kind of wanted to rent it a time or two but I didn't want to sink $4.99 plus tax into doing it. So getting to see it for free was nice.

The short review is it's funny and it was much better than I thought it was going to be. Samberg plays one of those idiot man boys who goofs his way through life until he finally gets what he wants, which is to kick his step father's ass. Samberg is quite winning in this role. At times he's so over the top it's hilarious and at other times he's the epitome of a shy man child trying to make his way in a world he never made. He deserved more credit than the big time movie critics gave him for his performance in this film.

His co-stars shine bright in this farce as well. Especially good are Isla Fisher (who is super cute in this movie but she'll never be super cute enough to make me watch her Confessions of a Shopaholic), Jorma Taccone (as Samberg's younger half brother), Danny McBride (who I like in everything because he's playing essentially the same stupid funny character in everything I see him in), Bill Hader, Will Arnett, and Ian McShane as Samberg's step dad.

This movie is actually worth the price of a rental and I recommend this sweet goofy little comedy.

And finally, a few months ago I bought the remake of Dawn of the Dead on DVD for $3 at Big Lots and I watched most of it again last night. I had seen it before and I loved it and seeing it again reminded me of how much Sarah Polley kicks ass.
Sure Ving Rhames kicks ass in this movie too but really no one kicks more ass than Sarah Polley in this zombie gore fest of a film, just look at her with that shot gun in the photo above, she's barefoot, in her jammies, bloody from being attacked by her undead zombie husband, and she's ready to shoot your ass if you mess with her. Am I a bit prejudiced because she's my adopt-an-actor from Canada? Damn right I am. And on the strength of her performance alone I recommend this zombie movie.

It's Adopt an Actor Day!

Happy Adopt an Actor day everybody! For those of you who do not know, Adopt an Actor was started by Splotchy on his blog and it soon spread like wildfire to other blogs. It's a way to celebrate the work of some great actors and, in my case, it's another reason to post pictures of pretty women.

I'm going to use today's holiday to adopt another actor. And since I have one each from Britain, Ireland, and Scotland, it's time to jump across the pond and adopt an actor from our neighbor to the north, Canada. I had a tough time deciding between Leslie Nielsen, Molly Parker, and Sarah Polley. But in the end I chose...
actor, writer, and filmmaker Sarah Polley! I chose Ms. Polley because I've been a long time fan of her work. She's been in some of my favorite films, The Adventures of Baron Munchhausen (which I'm due to watch again soon because it's been over a year since I last saw it), Go, eXistenZ, Dawn of the Dead, and The Claim. She was also in the recent HBO mini series about John Adams, the scene where she gets her cancerous breast removed is gut and heart wrenching. She's not only a damn fine actor, she's also a very well regarded screenwriter and recently she's added directorto her long list of show biz accomplishments. And she recently got to meet my blog buddy K-Line.
Please welcome Miss Sarah Polley to my stable of adopted actors and be sure to catch one of her films or TV shows real soon!

Has the cold and the snow got you down?

Maybe a look at my adopted Irish actor will snap you out of it. Here's Ms. Eva Birthistle smiling away the gloom of a winters day for you:
Haven't seen any of her movies yet? Why shame on you! Rectify that by watching A Fond Kiss and Breakfast on Pluto right away.

Here's one of my adopted actors with a message for every one

I'm sure she'd agree that it would also be a good idea for all people to stop all violence against all other people and animals as well. But as far as I can tell it's always open season on insects.

Let me eat cake

Sometimes I listen to the corporate media movie reviewers too much and I miss out on good movies because they give them bad reviews. I'm not really sure why I do that, after all I have long stopped listening to their blathering about politics and world affairs because I know better than to believe their pro corporate hype, so I really should do the same thing when it comes to films.

After reading a post by Matty Boy, or as I call him, 'my west coast doppelganger,' about the films of Sofia Coppola, I decided to catch the one film of hers that I have not seen yet. So last night we watched this film: And while it's not great, it's still pretty damn good. The corporate media reviewers did not like this film for two reasons and those reasons are that the film portrays Marie Antoinette in a sympathetic light and the soundtrack was too "modern," Ms. Coppola uses a lot of rock music instead of the usual Mozart, Bach, and the like.

They make the point, which is oh so true, in the "making of" feature, which runs waaaaaaaaaaay too long by the way, that Marie was a victim of bad publicity and that she never said those infamous words, "Let them eat cake" when she heard that the French people had no bread. She was the victim of Jacobean "swiftboating." History has not been kind to her due to the lies and distortions of the hopped up French revolutionary mobs. Was she an out of touch rich snob? Yes. Was she part of the entrenched ruling class that lived off the backs of the poor? Yes. Was she a pampered obscenely rich white woman who never had to work a day in her life? Yes. But was she a calculating vindictive twat who mocked the starving people? No. She was born into privilege and she took full advantage of it, much like Cindy Bush-McCain does today. To have a film like this portray her closer to what she really was is to upset a couple hundred years of entrenched historical fallacy, fallacies that are held dear by many of the corporate media movie reviewers.

The use of modern rock and roll in the soundtrack, while distracting to some, was entirely appropriate because this film sought to throw off the shackles of distorted history and show a modern take on the life of Marie Antoinette. The choice of modern music reflected Coppola's modern look at Antoinette's life. The script was daring and modern, so the music had to be also.
All in all I enjoyed the film and the performances by all the leads in the cast. Kirsten Dunst was very well cast and did a super job in her role. She was the picture of milky cuteness and she looked great in and out of her period costumes. I loved Judy Davis, my adopted actor Shirley Henderson, Molly Shannon, Rip Torn, and Asia Argentino as well.

The movie was well shot, it has a ton of great odd shots with odd camera angles all through out it. It's well edited, and well scored as well. I'll say this for Ms. Coppola, she may not be the greatest actor in the world, but she does make a damn fine film. I recommend this movie, as well as all her other ones, especially Lost in Translation and The Virgin Suicides.

Say shava shava!

Here's some Bollywood goodness featuring Amitabh Bachchan, the actor we adopted on the SOAPIFF blog.

Archie's new film

You can see the trailer for the new movie Archie Panjabi is in by clicking here. Or if you think you can handle it, watch this.

Another adoption

Since I have already adopted an a female actor from Britain, Archie Panjabi, and a female actor from Scotland, Shirley Henderson, I needed a female actor from Ireland to round out my adoptees, so I decided to adopt the small in stature (she's 5'4") but big in talent Irish female actor Eva Birthistle.

I first became aware of Ms. Birthistle from her star turn in the film A Fond Kiss, which is a new favorite here at Monkey Central.  She's also been in another favorite film of mine Breakfast on Pluto.  She's been in a slew of Brit made TV shows and is in some new films too.  Please welcome Eva to the Monkey Muck family of adopted actors!  

Hello?

Hi Archie, yes it's me.

Are you going to tell everyone the news?

Yes Archie.

Okay then.  Go on, tell them while I'm on the line with you.

Hey everybody, Archie has been cast in a new film called Espion.  It's a romantic thriller about spies and stuff.

Good.  Thanks for telling everybody.

Sure thing Archie.  I'm glad to help get the word out.  Now, since I did a favor for you I'd like you to do a favor for me...

What is it?

How about you come to Monkey Central and I do a tasteful photo shoot of you and I interview you for the blog.

Ummm...

Well?

I can't hear you.  Our connection is breaking up....

Archie, come on.  Be a sport.  I'll even make you dinner.

Hello?  Hello?  I can't hear.....(click)

Ok.  I see how it is.  

Thanks for nothin' you good for nothin' citizens of Toronto

A few months a go I asked you people to get off your asses and go snap a photo of my adopted actress Archie Panjabi on the set of her new movie. Then today I look on IMDB and I see they are in post production, so that means none of you got off your lazy butts and did me the favor I asked of you.

Thanks.

Thanks for nothing!

Would it have killed one of you to put down your Molson and your Canadian bacon sandwich and walk a few feet to take a freakin' picture? Could you not have turned off the CBC so you could have done me this one favor I asked of you? Were those issues of Macleans just so damn absorbing that you couldn't have helped out a fellow North American?

Citizens of Toronto you are now on my shit list. I hope the Blue Jays suck this year and I hope Les Habs kick your Maple Leaf thong wearing butts all over the ice. Since I hate the NBA with a hate that burns white hot, I hope your Raptors get beat every single time they play. Don't bother apologizing to me you citizens of Toronto, you are all dead to me now.
Don't hate me Archie, I tried to get you and your new film Traitor some more publicity but the selfish people of Toronto refused to help me.

Happy Birthday Shirley Henderson

Please join my running mate and I in wishing my adopted actor Ms. Shirley Henderson a happy 42nd birthday.

Like most things Scottish, Ms. Henderson keeps getting better with age.

We here at Monkey Muck wish you a very happy birthday and many many many more Shirley.

Who's holding our Crunky now?

French actress, and one of the adopt an actor adoptees of Monkey-Scan, Michelle Laroque was holding our Crunky but she ate it. So I taught her a lesson and I put her in time out in the corner.

Speaking of Halloween....

...my adopted actor Shirley Henderson would like to remind you that she plays the ghost Moaning Myrtle in the Harry Potter films.

So how about one of you gals dressing up as her character for Halloween this year? Would it kill you to show Shirley some love?

Who's holding our Crunky now?

Archie Panjabi was holding our Crunky but she lost it. Bad girl Archie! I think you know what happens to bad girls Ms. Panjabi. That's right, they get spanked. So don't be surprised when Dr. Monkey spanks you, you naughty Crunky losing minx.

Shirley Henderson fansite

I stumbled across this cool fansite for my adopted actor Shirley Henderson.
Come now, look at that picture. Is she not cute as a button? Ok, now stop staring and go watch the Dr. Who episode she was in or even better watch her in the indie film Intermission.

Missing persons

It is with great sadness that I come before you all to tell you I have had to send two of my adopted actors back to the actors orphanage. I knew I was taking on a full load by writing this blog and adopting four actresses as well but I honestly thought I could handle it.


It turns out I made a mistake, I could not handle all that estrogen and all the gynergy (hat tip to my friend Todd for coining the word "gynergy" so many years ago) that was flowing around here was too much for me to handle. So I had to let two of my actors go.


Cloris, while a super duper woman and actress, a fine vegetarian, and a great mother and grandmother, had quite the drinking problem. She was constantly drinking up our beer and wine and then demanding more. It got so bad that she was downing kegs and terrorizing the neighborhood kids, so off she went. She's in rehab and off my side bar, thank goodness! Remember to "take it easy" "one day at a time" Cloris!

The lovely bosomy Scot Ms. Ashely Jensen was next to go. She insisted on wearing dresses that allowed her boobs to pop out at the drop of a hat and when I began to spend all my time tossing all my hats to the ground when she was around, it became clear that I was not going to get much done. So I sent Ms. Jensen back to the actor's orphanage.

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I'm sticking with my first adoptee Archie Panjabi and to keep her company I'm also keeping the feisty and pint sized Scottish lass Shirley Henderson. I'll be able to keep spreading the word about these two fine ladies more often now that I don't have to worry about boobs popping out at in appropriate times and a drunken 70 something yr old woman on the loose.

Attention citizens of Toronto, Canada and Morocco

It has come to my attention that my first adopted actor, Ms. Archie Panjabi, will be in your fine countries in September and November.

She's been cast in a new film called Traitor that is going to be shot in Toronto and Morocco.
From what I could tell on IMDB she is the female lead.

So I was wondering if you fine people in Canada and Morocco would do me a solid. Could you please snap a picture of Archie on the set of her new movie for me? And then email me that picture?

Or you could even ask her to be in a photo with you. I may not crop you out of it if you send it to me and you are not hideous looking.Of course I don't expect you to do this sort of thing for free. If you send me a photo of Archie on the set of her new film then I'll send you a quarter, a bright shiny American quarter.

Thanks in advance for takin' care of this for me. I really appreciate it.