That cute little smiling imp the the picture above has tagged me with the Curriculum meme that's slowly making it's way around. That chubby cheeked imp who is smiling so big, for those of you who do not know, is Delia Guzman. She is one of my blog buds and the more stuff of hers that I read the more I think she may be the Hispanic side of me I never knew was there. She writes two blogs, like me, she's left leaning, like me, she's funny, well I try anyway, she's into Harry Potter and BBC Britcoms, like me, and we're roughly the same age, we're both 29ish, shut up, we are! In addition to all that she also wrote this
bittersweet powerful post and she adopted two of my favorite actors on her blogs, Rachel Weisz
and Hugo Weaving. So given all that, how could I refuse her anything?
Here's the rules of the meme which she got via the person who tagged her, FranIam: “You must write about 5 classes you would like to take if you could make up your own curriculum. AND- and this is important, ONE of them must come from your tagger's list.”
So the class I'd take from Delia's curriculum is this one:
1) Blogging: Philosophy and Practice (with Lab)This course would be the highlight of my day, because all my bloggy heroes—D-cap, D-cup, FranSheIs, Jess Wundrun, Matty Boy, Princess Sparkle Pony, Dr Monkey, Splotchy, Whiskey Marie, GetKristiLove, VikkiTikkiTavi, and everyone else whose blogs I love would also be enrolled in the class! The Lab would be wall-to-wall laptops with WiFi of course, and a few TVs on all the classic content-inspiring channels – CNN, Discovery, Animal Planet, Faux “News” Channel, Style Network, E Entertainment, etc. Talking, food, and fellowship required!
Yep. I'd have to agree with her there. I'd love love LOVE to take that class. Oh wait, hang on, I think I may actually teach that class.
Now, here are my additions:
2) Elvis-ology 548-This is an upper level class that is open to anyone. It focuses on the musical career of Elvis Costello. Class attendees will listen to most Elvis Costello recordings over and over. However, his classical music recordings, the Burt Bacharach collaborations, and the CD entitled "North," will not be covered in this class, but feel feel free to listen to them on your own. In addition to listening to the recordings of Mr. Costello, concert attendance will also be required should any of his tours come to your town and you must catch all his appearances on television when possible. Appreciation of the music of his current wife Diana Krall, while not a prerequisite for this class, is highly recommended.
3)
Flavor: The Use of Spices and Herbs in Cooking 101-This class will teach you how to use spices and herbs in your cooking to enhance the flavors of all the foods you cook. It will also teach you that the word "spicy" does not mean scalding hot. If you like your food bland and flavorless then do not take this class, instead, please continue to buy and eat the tasteless shit they sell at your local grocery store deli.
4) Walking Tall, Shopping Taller 342- This class will teach you how to have the backbone to speak up and stand up for yourself when you get shit on, ignored, or hassled by a store employee, waiter/waitress, and or a soul crushing multinational corporation. You will learn to differentiate between when a clerk or wait person is having a bad day and when they just want to get rid of you and we'll also cover how to deal with companies who love to screw over their customers, like Charter Cable, Comcast, and every insurance company that you ever tried to file a claim with.
5)
They May Talk Funny But Boy Oh Boy Do They Look Great And Man, Are They Wildly Talented or What?! 750-This class will teach you how to appreciate non North American born actresses. You'll learn to appreciate women like Helen Mirren, Penelope Cruz, Carmen Mura, Michelle Laroque, Liz Hurley, Irene Jacob, Sophie Okenedo, Shirley Henderson, Keisha Castle-Hughes. Special emphasis will be placed on appreciating the following actresses:
Indira Varma
Namrata Shirodkar
Archie Panjabi
So there you have it. That's my continuing education class schedule for the rest of my life. I now tag Ed from
Enriched Geranium, his lovely wife
Suzy,
Jess Wundrun, and
D Cup. If any of you don't want to do it, that's fine too. And if you do want to do it, then there's no hurry to get it done.
"Hi everyone, Daredevil here. You know me as the blind superhero/attorney from the pages of Marvel comics, but you may not know that I have taken on a new challenge. In addition to all my other jobs and duties, I'm now the official "listener" of this blog. You can tell me anything, go on level with me and I'll never judge you. I'm just here to listen to you unburden yourself. Go on, open up and tell ol' Daredevil anything."
"George Bush here, or in other words, the President of the US and A. I'm here to level with you and tell you I'd be shocked if they ever arrest me for anything I've done while in office. My high crimes and misdemeanors have been waaaaay worse than Nixon's, and yet the Congress lets me go right on fuckin' over the poor and working class people of this country. Heh, heh, heh, Hell fire, they may give me a medal or something before I go. If I go, that is, heh, heh, heh."
"Ya'll don't know me but I'm gonna level with ya, if you looked like Dick Cheney as much as I look like Dick Cheney, then you'd be drinking like a fish and smoking like a porn star's privates after a gang bang movie shoot too." 
"I'm a half full bottle of Cheerwine, I've got nothing to level with you about. Sorry double D."
"I'd like to level with you Mr. Daredevil and tell you that I, Nigella Lawson, love it when someone tells me I look like Blue Gal." 
"I'm not gonna lie to you Daredevil, I'm gonna level with you, this is not what it looks like. Neither I or the white woman know who the hell this monkey is. He just showed up in our sauna, we seriously have no clue as to who he is. Can you tell us sir, does he bite?"
"Namrata Shirodkar here, and I'm gonna level with you. Can you believe I was the third or fourth hottest chick in Bride and Prejudice? I mean come on! How crazy is that? In any other movie I'd be the #1 hot chick on the set, go figure."
"Hardly anybody in the USA knows that I, Prime Minister of Canada Brian Harper, am not Bush's poodle like Tony Blair was. Nope, no siree, I am most certainly not his poodle. I am however Bush's bee-otch. Word. Yo. I'm da mack daddy of all bitchez, yo.".jpg)
"What that bottle of Cheerwine said goes double for me, so sayeth this bucket o' chum."
"I'll level with you. I don't know jack shit about economics, diplomacy, meteorology, animal husbandry, the father of modern genetics Gregor Mendel, bowling, hot pants, disco dancing, the revolutions of 1848, the price of tea in China, what my minister John Hagee believes, and economics, I know I already said it once but I figured I better toss it in again. But I do know a little something about playing the 'I was a POW in Vietnam' card. Oh have I never told you about how I was a prisoner of war in Vietnam? Well, sit down then and I'll..." 
"I'll level with you Daredevil and I'll tell you that while I appreciate Dr. Monkey pushing me to be Senator Obama's running mate this fall, I am considering taking a restraining order out against him. I think he's got an unhealthy crush on me or something."
