An important message from your beloved Dr. Monkerstein

My fellow Americans I have called this poolside speech because I want to talk to you about a very important issue, immigration. It has been on my mind a lot lately and I have posted one piece about it already.

Incredibly enough after that post hit the internets some people still insist that the flow of Americans who were born in other American countries into the USA is a bad thing. It is mainly to these people that I address my remarks. All of you others may listen in if you like, if not feel free to fix yourself something drink. May I suggest a fruity Mai Tai?

Everyone ready? Ahh good. Here we go:

I heard an interview last night on NPR with some older people who were attending a Reich wing Republican affair of some sort in rural Georgia. They were assailing their Reich wing Republican senators for not being tough enough on immigration.

These old fogeys went on to say that their main concerns were the security of this nation and the flow of people from other American countries into this one, although to be a bit fair to them they used the term 'illegal immigrants.' As these paper skinned soon to be Soylent Green fossils spoke, I realized that they did not understand who was at fault here, they foolishly blamed our 'lax policy' on immigration for the flow of so called illegals into this nation. They said that the immigrants were taking our jobs and using up all our precious health care.

They are, of course, as wrong as wrong can be, misguided, and uninformed as to who the real culprits behind the health care crisis are.

First of all, I have already addressed how we can end terrorism forever in this previous post.

Second, the real culprits behind the health care crisis in this great nation of ours are not the many fine Americans who come from other American countries to live and work here,

the real culprits are the greedy (at this point I would usually call them "greedy pig fucking corporations", but I can no longer insult the many fine swine of this nation) insurance corporations, the scum sucking HMOs, and the devilish pharmaceutical corporations.

These bastards caused this crisis due to their pursuit of profits. They charge obscene amounts of money for medical insurance premiums, ever higher prices for drugs, and outrageous amounts for hospital stays or emergency room visits. They keep going up on their prices so they can make more and more fucking money while they screw us out of decent medical care. The little kid in the emergency room who's parents came from Mexico seeking a better life than the one we and NAFTA screwed them out of is not the cause of the health care crisis in this nation.

Take the profit motive out of health care, like Dennis Kucinich wants us to do, and create a single payer health care system for all Americans and see if that doesn't solve the health care crisis.

Then when that's done let's repeal NAFTA, reign in the out of control greedy pig fu...(damn old habits are hard to break) corporations, and start treating other people like we want to be treated and see if that doesn't stop the immigration problem.

If you can't see that the problem is that this bastard, he's the CEO of United Healthcare, is making far too much money, then there is something wrong with you and you should go to a hospital, if you can afford it that is.

That's all I have time for now, I need to get back to my pool so I can practice my half gainer with a lemon twist.