Misplaced priorities

Some people are outraged that kids were playing on the Women's Vietnam War memorial statue instead of being outraged that our country is almost constantly at war.

Let's check in with a teabagger who's in the path of this weekend's super huge winter storm

"I hate big government and it's greedy grabby hands.  I ought to be able to keep all the money I make and not have to pay it in taxes where it gets wasted on salaries for fat cat union thug teachers and cops and city employees.  I know best how I'd spend that money, fuck the government.  Those lazy bastards had better not sit on their fat asses and let all that snow pile up or let the power lines that come to my house go down.  And if I can't make it to work tomorrow, I better be able to go to the library and check out some books by my heroes on Fox News.  Also, if school is closed for any length of time they better find something to do with my kids.  I can't look after them and surf for porn on the internet.  God damn it, when's that snow plow gonna get here?  My street is getting snowed under."

Working moms

I don't care if Ann Romney worked outside of the home, after all raising children is tough hard work.  And I salute all the maids, nanny's, cooks, and cleaning ladies who helped Mrs. Romney raise her five sons.  I'm sure those women had their hands full finding baby sitters so they could go outside of the home to work to help Ann raise and clean up after her kids.

Remember when this guy was our friend?

Yeah. I kind of remember when Tony Blair wasn't a toad who cozied up to war criminals. Hell, I remember when Tony Blair hadn't even become a war criminal yet.

The happiest man in Al Qaeda

One can't help but notice how fast guys who held the number 2 position in Al Qaeda get killed. It seems like one gets mowed down almost every day. So you gotta figure that Al-Zawari has got to be tickled pink with his promotion to the top of Al Qaeda. He's added at least 10 to 12 years to his life.

Back to school shopping?

Sure, you've loaded up on flannel shirts and Doc Marten's for the kids. And maybe you've laid in a supply of malt liquor, doughnuts, and downers for the teens in your life, but no angst ridden potentially suicidal teen is really ready to go back to school without his or her Kurt Cobain lunch box:
Kurt Cobain lunch boxes, they smell like teen spirit!

Sound Repbulican Science

Back in in late 1960's then President Nixon looked out at this nation and he saw a scourge. This scourge was none other than pornography. He and his team of quisling ministers led by Billy Graham decided that the problem with all those hippies and potheads was they were looking at too much porn and all that porn was surely causing the sexual revolution. And as we have come to learn, the Republicans along with their intellectual handmaidens, the evangelicals, must stamp out anything fun, exciting, or liberating. But Nixon felt like he needed some kind of science behind his desire to stamp out porn so he convened a blue ribbon group of scientists and they actually did a study on the effects of porn on humans. They used scientifically sound methods and they studied porn up one side and down the other. Finally after months and months of looking at porn in labs and studying it's effects on men and women this group of scientists made their findings public. In a nutshell they said that viewing and using porn had no ill effects on people and that long term use of porn did not turn people in raving sex mad monsters. As soon as the findings of this landmark study were released Nixon did something that would set a scientific precedent for all Republican Presidents in the future, he promptly had the study suppressed because it did not say what he wanted it to say. He did everything he could to discredit the study and he went on to claim, as did his cabal of quisling toadies, that porn did in fact turn people into raving sex maniacs, rapists, and child molesters.

Speaking as someone who has viewed more than my share of porn during those long years when I did not have a girlfriend, I can tell you that looking at porno mags did not turn me into a raving sex freak. But keep that under your hats okay? It wouldn't look good for my Presidential campaign if it got out that I read porno mags at one time. Thanks.


In the mid 1980's Reagan decided that porn was out of control and that he needed to do something about it. So he too convened a study of the subject. This time however he did not bother with anything so trivial as science. He got his sleazy goon of an Attorney General Ed Meese to gather together a group of like minded anti porn activists to testify how bad porn was for people. Reagan learned from Nixon's mistake and he did not let any one with knowledge of how the scientific method works anywhere near his porn study. So understandably the Meese Commission Report said that porn was bad and that it's use was harmful to people and to all living things on the planet.


In today's world porn is not so much the bogeyman that it once was, attitudes towards it have relaxed a bit but there is something far more troublesome and deadly to worry about out there and it's called HIV/AIDS. In the battle against HIV/AIDS our current President has, in true Republican science hating fashion, decided to put himself and this country's policy on the wrong side of the issue in order to please his evangelical masters. Our Idiot in Chief wants the government to keep teaching that abstinence is the best method to prevent HIV/AIDS.

He and his Reich wing religious buds don't want kids to know about condom use and they even got a medical doctor, my late unlamented Senator, Bill Frist, to claim that you could get AIDS from someone's tears. He wants to keep teaching kids that abstaining from sex is the best way even though study after scientific study has shown teens continue to have sex despite 6 years of being told that the best way to not get HIV/AIDS is to not do it. And now after 6 years of flawed failed abstinence lessons, Bush wants more money to continue to teach kids that they shouldn't be doing what normal kids will do no matter what. When you think about it though, he's right in line with his Republican predecessors and he's showing the same regard for science that they did.

Despite the drought...

We've had a bumper crop of sawdust and balls.

Suck on that you climate change cry babies.