How do you feel about the Hillary Clinton email 'scandal'?

"I feel nothing.  I am empty inside."

"I'm outraged by it but I don't have time to talk because I'm on my way to a Star Trek audition."

"It shows that Hillary feels like she can't trust big government, the very same big government that is forcing me to pose in this ridiculous manner, which is also the same big government that she helped institute."

"I get my hair cut in the style of Martin Luther, so what the fuck do I know about email?"

"Hillary is a witch!  Burn her!"

"Did someone mention something about Star Trek auditions?"

"I care not a fig for her emails.  What worries me is her unstinting support for those genocidal maniacs in charge over there in Israel."

"I'm dead, can you not see that?  So honestly, I don't give a shit about her or her emails, or who's vagina her hubby is sliding a cigar into these days.  Wait...hang on...if I'm dead how am I answering questions?  Why am I still sentient?  Is this heaven?  Hell?  Oh shit, I think it's New Jersey.  Well, if that's the case I'm fucked.  Thanks a lot Obama."

"Oh, I see, you finally include a woman.  I see that I'm nothing but a token in this post.  You ask a bunch of men including a dead one before you get around to asking me.  Well, you know what?  I'm not telling you what I think.  And I'm not going to bake you a pie or even be nice to you.  So go away.  I mean it."

Movie reports

This sequel to the Star Trek reboot is big, loud, and messy.  But it's still a lot of fun.  Kirk is a more than a bit of a stiff in this one but the rest of the cast make up for him.  Lots of special effects, explosions, and people fighting on moving vehicles and on high places.  Recommended.

 An apartheid era cop sees that his force is stretched thin keeping blacks down so he decides to see if he can get away with robbing a bank.  He does, and so he decides to rob some more.  Eventually they realize it's him, they catch him, and try and convict him.  But of course he busts out of prison and keeps on robbing banks until the South African government get sick of him making a mockery of them.  He escapes and gets gunned down in the good old USA.  It's all gritty, intense, and gripping but it's also glorifying a lawless thug who used the apartheid system to enrich himself and to commit robbery.  In the end I didn't like this one because they wanted me to like a repellent criminal, they wanted to make him seem like some kind of folk hero when in fact he was a weasel.  Good performances all around, especially by Deborah Kara Unger, in an unlikable film.

I don't give a shit if you don't like pro wrestling.  Turn your nose up at it, say it's 'fake.'  I don't give a shit.  It is, no matter what the intelligentsia try to say, a very hard form of performance art.  It combines storytelling with athleticism, and it's practitioners are some of the best actors in the world, it takes talent to get beat up and stay in character all the time.  Pro wrestlers suffer an inordinate amount of injuries and their careers are short due to the heavy workload and the dangerous moves they must do in their performances.  This film tells the story of a female wrestling show that came about during the wrestling boom of the early 1980's.  You can tell the women who were this league loved what they did and many of them clearly miss it.  This is a fascinating and sometimes heartbreaking film about them and the men who were behind the endeavor.  Highly recommended.

A Monkey Movie Report

I seriously liked this reboot of the Star Trek franchise:They kept everything that was good about Star Trek, the characters, the way they interact with one another, and the main broad brush strokes of the Star Trek universe, and they cut the cheesy crap out, and by cheesy crap I mean Shatner (Settle down Shatner lovers, your hero is way too old to be in these movies anymore and these days he's devolved into a parody of himself.) and the dated stuff that's boring and crappy.

The film is clever, exciting, and a joy to watch. If we're lucky every 30 or 40 years this franchise will get another reboot that's as good as this one. It'll do the franchise good to have it refashioned for each new generation.

Monkey movie reviews

I had resisted seeing Doubt because I'm not really into any kind of religious films whatsoever, but seeing as how we've been on an Amy Adams movie binge lately I rented this one the other day and we watched it Saturday night. And my bottom line is, it's damn good.

Without delving into the plot too much, because I don't want to give anything away to those who have not seen it, the film is about a miserable nun (Meryl Streep) who's twisted brand of religion is stuck up her ass so far it comes out her mouth, who clashes with a priest Phillip Seymour Hoffman) who wants to modernize his church. Stuck between them is a young black boy (Joseph Foster), his mother (Viola Davis), and a young nun (Amy Adams).

It's a well written, superbly acted gem of a film. All the main actors turn in stellar performances but the one that really stands out and shines so bright that it will blind you is that of Viola Davis. Her screen time is minimal and her lines are few compared to her co-stars but boy fucking howdy is she great.

This is the Streep/Adams film you need to see if you haven't seen it yet. Avoid Julie & Julia and see Doubt.

I highly recommend this film not only because it so good and because of the twists in it, I actually recommend it because it should be a mirror to you church going people. In it you'll see all kinds of people in your church, even if you have never been to a Catholic mass in your life. Meryl Streep's character is every sanctimonious judgmental church going prick who ever clucked their tongue at someone they disagreed with. Her character is universal in church circles, she's the one who acts like she's better than every one else in your church or synagogue and she's the one who wants to be the moral compass of your house of worship even though she embodies none of whatever are the best qualities of your specific religion are. And no matter how cool or hip you think your church is, no matter how progressive your pastor is, there's at least one of Meryl's character in your church right this minute.

John Patrick Shanley, the screen writer and director of Doubt, says in one of the DVD featurettes that he envisioned this story as a very specific story about the nuns who taught him in his youth, but what he's given us is a universal story filled with religious and societal archetypes.


In a much lighter vein, I watched Trekkies 2 this past Friday night. I saw Trekkies many years ago and I loved it, so I was skeptical about a sequel. I wondered if there was enough material there for another feature length film about obsessed fans.

I needn't have worried. There's probably enough material about people who obsess over the various incarnations of Star Trek for fifty more films.

This film is about the foreign Trekkies, and I know they prefer the term 'Trekker,' but as is pointed out in the film Gene Roddenberry, the man who created the Star Trek universe, coined the phrase Trekkies so that's the one I'm going to use. The film shows us Aussie fans, British fans, German and Italian fans, Brazilian fans, and even Serbian fans of Star Trek. Some are into the first incarnation, some are into The Next Generation, some are into Deep Space Nine, and so on and so on. It's a hoot seeing Denise Crosby, aka Tasha Yar, interact with German Klingons, Italian Kirks, and British Frengis. The film also catches us up with a few of the people from the first film and it showcases the various Star Trek bands that have sprung up, both rock and folk.

Having been a fan of the original, The Next Generation, and quite a few of the films, I found this film and the first one as well, highly entertaining and kind of heartwarming. The fans who go the extra mile and dress up as various characters and who face the scorn and derision of those who aren't into Star Trek are kind of heroic I think. They put it all out there on the line for all to see and make fun of and they get called all kinds of names and face all sorts of mockery, and let's face it, you and I both have made jokes about them, but still they do what makes them happy. For them Star Trek is a not only a TV show, it's a way of life and a way to meet and connect with others.

This film is a sweet Valentine to the oddballs and nerds who love and live Star Trek. I recommend this one highly.

At least he didn't ask in Klingon