Monday, December 19, 2011

Old white guys wearing glasses weigh in on the issues of the day

Ripley Knockaround of Jupiter's Thigh, Iowa says, "I want to use live ammo in the war on Christmas. These Jewish atheist gay Muslims got to realize that we Christians are tired of being oppressed into saying 'Happy holidays' and 'Season's Greetings.' I'm ready for others to die because of my beliefs."

John Ivanisectickwi of Raleigh, North Carolina says, "I have a tiny penis. That's all."

Lurid Panhole of Whigs Bottom, Oregon has this to say, "Kim Jong Il may be dead but the love his people have for him will live on, much like the anthrax I spread in the local deli restrooms and truck stops will live on."

Dothan Larkswinger of Love Canal, NY is excited about Michele Bachmann. "I bet she's great in the sack. And the sack I mean is a burlap sack that's full of rabid badgers and a cinder block that's been tossed in a river."

"While you're reading this bullshit blog post gays are getting married and Mexicans are converting to Mormonism. And no, you can't have my name or city and state of residence."

1 comment:

zencomix said...

That last guy is Henry Kissinger, and we know where he lives.