"It upset me so bad that I had to go back to using training wheels on my bike."
"Dude, fuck some 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' bullshit. Can't you see we got a kid to raise here? Hopefully we can get on that new MTV 2 show Preteen Mom so we can make some coin. Pampers ain't cheap homey."
"They asked. I told. We plotzed!"
"I got a sack full of gay mail to deliver to gay males which means I no longer have time to save the whales or to sniff Christian Bale's snails. So you could say it took the wind is out of my sails."
"I just canceled my plans to go join the Marines. I was gonna go and join up but now that I might have to get gay married or have sweaty sex with a bull dyke, well that's just too much for me to bear. I want to defend my country and all, but I draw the line at letting some drill sergeant drill me. So instead of leading men into battle or doing whatever them Marines do, I'll go into the family business of providing out of date magazines to the waiting rooms of doctors and dentists."