Question a day

Today's question comes to me from one of my good blog friends who just happens to be one of my favourite Canadians ever, Barbara. Barb wants to know: "Would you rather be twice your height or half your height?"Excellent question Barbara.

Since I am around 5'9" twice my height would put me around 12 feet tall. Life at that height would be hell. I'd be stooping all the time and hitting my head on shit and since I'm too old to play in the NBA, I hate hate hate pro basketball by the way, I probably could not cash in on my freakish tallness. I guess I could join a freak show if I was that tall but that would mean I'd have to hang out with the Bearded Lady, Pig Boy, some weirdo with piercings all over every part of his body, and some god damned clowns. Ick. No thanks.

On the other hand since I currently weigh around 223, yeah shut up I know I need to drop some pounds, so do you I bet, go look in the mirror Mr. or Ms. Fatty McButter Britches and you'll see you need to drop some too, I have to go with half my weight. I could feasibly pull off weighing 111 pounds at my height, yes, I'd get a lot of stares and people would assume I was anorexic or some kind method actor getting ready to do a role in Bent. But weighing that little might have it's advantages as well, for instance I'd be able to wear all those Gap brand jeans and Old Navy khaki pants that are hanging in my closet that no longer fit me and I'd finally have the body to go with my starving artist attitude.

But really, I'm pretty comfortable with who I am and the way my body is. Yes, I need to drop about 30 pounds but all in all, I'll take what I got and work with it.

Thanks for sending in a question Barb!

I still need a couple more questions to finish out this month of queries. Send your questions to me at monkeymuck(at)gmail(dot)com and I'll answer one a day until the end of the month.