"John McCain said we won the Iraqi war. Do we get some kind of prize other than a huge national debt, dead soldiers, and thousands of wounded vets?"
"Your dead kids don't trump my Constitutional right to the pear suit of happiness!"
"I don't care what that bitch Michelle Bachmann Obama says, if I want to feed my kids Cheetos and beer, I'll do it. I don't need big government telling me what to do."
"This bullshit about us catching a Benghazi terrorist is bullshit. It's a ploy to make Obama look good. You never saw Bush stooping to that kind of shit. Bush never went after Bin Laden after 9/11, he went after Saddam and by God, he got him."
"Me? Go back to Iraq and fight them militants because Obama fucked it all up when he invaded them in 2003 to make us all forget about how he mishandled Katrina and Benghazi? Oh hell to the no, I won't go. Send Eric Cantor, I hear that Jew boy needs a job."
"When do I get my free health care? Before or after I get gay married to a Muslim Mexican?"