"We're afraid our taxes will go to helping out some lazy brown skinned person. And we're afraid of getting another perm for the wife. Holy shit, look at her. When I'm doing her from behind I imagine I'm getting in on with a poodle, and that shit ain't right."
"We're afraid of Muslims, queers, liberals, soccer fans, and the fact that we might be related."
"We're afraid of catching something at all the biker orgies we go to. Also, sunscreen scares us."
"Two words: Alyson Hannigan."
"We're afraid Jim here might be gay. We know for sure his boyfriend is gay so we suspect he may be too. Mitt Romney's hair is also frightening to us."