An apology

My fellow Americans, I come before you today to apologize to the good people of Amway. I do this on the advice of my attorneys from the law firm of Beehive, Gynergy, & Opera Glove.
It seems in an earlier post today I said the the products sold by Amway were "shitty substandard products." My lawyers tell me that I let my anger about the bastards at Blackwater USA get in the way of the cold hard facts about Amway's product line.

I sincerely apologize for any and all hurt feelings caused by my statement. I hereby apologize for saying that Amway products are "shitty" and "substandard."

And furthermore, I would like to remind all readers of this humble little blog of the following things about Amway products:

None of the products in the picture above have been known to cause cancer or sudden highly painful death if used internally.

This group pf products do not contain human excrement. They are most certainly not unsafe for human consumption.

There if no truth to the rumor that these products will fucking kill you if you use them.

Thank you for paying attention and please continue to purchase as much of Amway's fine products as you did before.