"Hello, 911? I think the negro outside my house is going to kill me and my family. He's got some sort of cutting device that is capable of severing heads. I'm going to stop him before he murders us in cold blood."
"Sir, do not engage the negro, you might get hurt."
"Fuck that, I'm going after that coon ass."
BANG! BANG!
"Hello 911? That negro came after me with what turned out were pruning shears. I had to shoot him. He might be dead but the important thing is my white family and I are safe. Here, talk to my lawyer..."
"It's true. My client shot the black boy in self defense, you know how these things go sir. Lawn guys kill so many of their clients, especially the white ones who wear ascots."
"Sounds good to me. Case closed."
