"Pictures of hot guys in skimpy Speedos, but it's okay because I'm totally not gay."
"I'm looking at a life time of drudgery working in jobs I hate."
"I'm looking at taking over the world with the aid of this machine and a few well placed atomic wedgies."
"Filmstrips about Jesus."
"My knob. I'm going to jerk it off soon."
"This modern art wire sculpture, I'm pretty sure it's a metaphor for the meaninglessness of modern life or it represents the sexual feelings I have towards my hot mother."