Tuesday, February 17, 2015

And here's a special report from the Southern Baptist Men's Committee on Homosexuality in the Boy Scouts of America

A while back we stopped the Boy Scouts from using our churches as a meeting place because they had recently become more accepting of the gay homosex and those who practice it's deviant lifestyle.  Many of you complained that we were being intolerant and reactionary.  So we decided to investigate what's become of the once great non gay God fearing America loving Boy Scouts since we parted ways with them.  Here is a partial list of our findings:

Most all Scout troops now force impressionable young men to play leap frog in the hopes of getting them sexually stimulated by letting their genitals graze each other as they leap over and get leaped over.  Many troops also insist that Scouts now spend most of their time doing squat thrust crotch related exercises in the hopes of building up the size of young penises.

The BSA now mandates that Scouts sleep in this position in case another Scout wishes to engage in anal intercourse with them.  If you refuse the anal intrusion, you are blackballed and then drummed out of the Scouts.

Scouts, especially the ones in New York city and San Francisco, must model their young chiseled bodies for leering gay homosex crazed officials and other Scouts who may be ready to try the gay lifestyle.

'Sensitive' Scouts are now encouraged to do things like make art, share feelings and emotions, and to dress like women.  Non gay manly activities such as shooting, tinkering with motors of all sorts, and fondling animals are now discouraged if not banned all together. 

All sorts of gay homosex touching and wrestling is now a big part of troop meetings.  

Music and songs celebrating the deviant side of life are mandatory.  And the rapping music is encouraged and lauded above all other forms of music.  Christian music is laughed at and spat upon.

Merit badges in ogling, leering, and catcalling gay homosex remarks are now awarded.  Also American flags are cut up into little squares and used for toilet paper.  


And perhaps most troubling of all, smoking of the reefers is encouraged because it makes the gay homosex orgasm more intense and because it makes blasphemy more fun.

So as you can see, everything that we thought was going to happen has happened.  And this proves once again that we Baptists are always right.  So, please join with us while you can before it too late.  Once Jesus comes back, you can't be all up in him unless you're saved and on the Baptist path to salvation. 

1 comment:

Mnmom said...

I suspected as much