"Miss Welch, how do you feel about Dick Cheney and others trying to rewrite history to absolve themselves on any blame in the mess in Iraq?"
"In case my expression doesn't say it all, it's pretty disgusting of the pigs who dragged us into two wars to try and cover the asses by blaming Obama for their failure to see that invading Iraq was a pretty damn dumb thing to do in the first place."
"Yo, Raquel, how can I protect my neck from the bites of Luis Suarez?"
"If you were a hood ornament how would you look?"
"If humans evolved from monkeys, why are there still monkeys?"
"Those who are ignorant of what the theory of evolution actually says often ask that stupid question. You see, we didn't evolve from monkeys, but humans and monkeys and every other living thing on earth evolved from a single common ancestor, that's what the theory of evolution says in a nutshell."
"You're awfully pretty and all, how'd you get so smart?"
"Being 'pretty and all' doesn't preclude one from having intelligence. Stop judging women by how they look you sexist freak."
"Do you ever pretend to be a robot?"
"Your simplistic question does not compute. Danger! Danger!"
"If you could do one thing over again what would you do?"
"I'd not agree to be in this silly post on this silly blog. Oh wait, I never agreed to it in the first place, some smart ass scanned a bunch of pictures of me and is putting words in my mouth. But if I could truly do one thing over again, I'd find Dr. Monkey and make sweet sweet jungle love with him. And then I'd set him up with my smokin' hot daughter Tahnee."