"Rubbing my ridiculous mutton chops on naughty children."
"Whatever I was doing, I'm going to stop so that I can start rubbing my ridiculous mutton chops on naughty children. What a great idea."
"Praising Vishnu Claus."
"Smelling the finger that I used to finger bang that elf with."
"Two nuns, one cup, if you get my meaning."
"Buying as much cheap Chinese made shit as I can and putting it on a credit card that I'll never ever pay off. And I'm getting drunk and persecuting Jehovah's Witnesses and Jews."