Tuesday, January 29, 2013

A tale of two movies

 Any and Every Which Way is a modern Japanese sex comedy that heavy on the sex and light on the comedy.  And when the comedy is there, it's really a poor attempt at slapstick, so it's good then that this film is mostly sex, some of which is not so good.

A taxi company has two women drivers, one flirts and uses her feminine wiles to get lots of fares and make the company all kinds of money, the other is a fuck up.  Both of them are extremely beautiful of course.  One night the fuck up gets into an accident and hits two cars.  She begs the other drivers not to report it or to tell her boss, she tells them she'll do anything to keep it quiet.  So of course they take anything to mean she'll fuck them so they pick her up, take her into a public restroom, and rape her, which of course she enjoys because this is a Japanese sex comedy.

The fuck up still gets into trouble with her boss and she's going to get fired unless she can make more money, so the other gal tells her to use her 'womanly weapons' more when looking for and transporting fares.  So of course the fuck turns her taxi into a rolling brothel, which the cops find out about, and they try to arrest her for being a whore.  Her friend helps her escape and she's so grateful they hug, but when they hug they decide to have sex so next thing we know both women are topless, fondling one another, and kissing while they fondle one another in a big bed.  Lots of topless kissing ensues, and come on people, I'm not made of stone, it's very hot.  Turns out the fuck up gets horny when anyone hugs her so she has to have sex with them.

After the hot girl on girl lovemaking, the fuck up steals the taxi for one more fare.  She picks up a scruffy guy who just got out of prison for killing another motorist in an accident one night.  They bond and he tells her his sad story and she confesses that she can't remember anything before the age of 22 because of a bump on the head she got one time a few years back in an auto accident.  After exchanging stories and a loaf of bread, they hug and book goes the dynamite they end up having sex which helps her regain her memories and she remembers that one night she was on a motorcycle with her boyfriend when they got hit by some guy.  Her boyfriend got killed and she figures out she just had sex with the guy who went to prison for accidentally killing her boyfriend in an auto accident.  So of course she forgives the guy and gives him a hug and they have sex again.  And again. 

Then because she likes the guy who killed the love of her life and made her lose all her memories for awhile, she helps him reunite with his hot wife.   I was kind of hoping they'd all have sex but no, they let me down, the dirty Japanese bastards.

All in all despite the beautiful women, the topless kissing, the breasts, the fondling, the simulated sex, this film is pretty crazy stupid. It's one of those Japanese films that aren't the least bit subtle or clever.  It's overbearingly dumb and it looks like it was filmed with a camera that had some sort of petroleum jelly smeared over the lens. 

If you're a fan of beautiful topless Japanese women, then this is your film.  Not recommended otherwise.

Iron Sky on the other hand, I highly recommend.  It's the finest sci fi action comedy to ever come out of Finland.  Period.

In 1945 at the end of WW2 a group of Nazis escape to the moon and set up a base where they flourish and build a fleet of ships that will one day attack earth and take it over.  The Fourth Reich will rise on again and it will be powered by helium 3, a moon based power source that will power everything on earth.

In 2010 the female president of the USA who looks a lot like Sarah Palin sends two astronauts to the moon in an effort to help her re-election.  One gets killed but the black on lives and he gets captured by the moon Nazis.  They seize his cell phone and try to use it to power their main attack ship but the phone shorts out.  So they decide to send one of their main guys to earth to get more technology to power their ship.  What ensues is the USA gets plunged into proto fascism, earth is invaded, the main hot moon Nazi woman falls for the black astronaut and has her eyes opened about Nazism, the moon Nazis invade, the world comes together to fight back, and in the end everything turns out okay for everybody except for the moon Nazis.

This film is hilarious and kick ass to boot.  It's very pop culture aware and it pays homage to the 'Hitler finds out' meme, Dr. Strangelove, and it doesn't shy away from showing our US political leaders to be the assholes they are.  Stand out performances are turned in by the sweetly sexy Julia Dietze as the uber hot Nazi moon maiden heroine, Christopher Kirby as the black male model turned astronaut who gets turned white for a time by the moon Nazis, and Gotz Otto as the moon Nazi leader who wants to take over earth.

I highly recommend this film, especially if you're a sci fi and or action film buff.


Kal said...

I have been following the production of Iron Sky since the first computer generated sequence came out. To see the complete movie is a treat. It reminds me of Black Dynamite for fun. I always say the higher the concept the more full retard you have to go on the execution and Iron Sky goes for it.

gmb said...

You had me at: It's the finest sci fi action comedy to ever come out of Finland.

Actually, I can't name another. That said, I want to see this. Thanks.

Ellis Nadler said...

I shall strive to obtain these gems