Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Things I don't give a shit about

  1. The whole Twilight series of books and the movies made from them. I'm not a teenage girl or a 'sensitive' male so I could care less about this piece of pop culture fluff.
  2. Kindles, IPads, and IPods. Seriously, fuck off Apple. And take electronic books with you.
  3. Who ever the Westboro Baptist Church says their god hates now. If they were outside my house protesting me, I wouldn't give them the time of day. They're publicity whores who pervert whatever good there is in Christianity.
  4. Saturday Night Live. Holy shit, why doesn't NBC not have the decency to pull the plug on this show?
  5. The Simpson's. Don't misunderstand me, I used to love The Simpson's and that show's place in our pop culture is secure forever but god damn, it stopped being funny years ago. And King of the Hill was never EVER funny.
  6. Political pundits. Sweet lord I hate all of them, the ones on the right and the ones on the left. They are all a pack of fame seeking publicity loving jackals. And toss in all the phony 'news' people at FOX Noise too. I'd rather watch test patterns and listen to the song stylings of progressive rockers like Rick Wakeman and Brian Eno than listen to those phony millionaire 'populists' on FOX.
  7. TV shows about cakes and bakeries. DO. NOT. WANT. Take one cup of sifted flour and shove it where the sun don't shine, then coat yourself in icing, and bake for 75 hours.
  8. Your tattoos and piercings. If you get a tat, I'm happy for you but I don't ever want to see it, especially after you've had it for a few years and the once firm young skin that you had it on is now droopy. Same thing with piercings, unless it's in your ear lobe. And honestly, more than one earlobe piercing per lobe is overkill.
  9. So called 'discount cards' at book and grocery stores. I'm not about to spend $25 to save ten percent. If I have to buy a shitload of books and over priced CD's and DVD's to make buying a discount card make sense, then that's not really a discount. And stop acting all hurt and annoyed when I tell you up front that I don't have or want a card.
  10. Finishing this post. Holy shit, I'm full of the bitter spoiled milk of inhuman unkindness tonight and.....................................................

8 comments:

Mnmom said...

I'm sooooo with you on ALL these. Those Twilight books are depressing pieces of crap. Tats are gross. Piercings are grosser. Now excuse me while I eat my high-fiber cereal and watch Antiques Road Show.

But seriously, I'm with you 100%

McGriddle Pants said...

GodHatesProtesters.Com

Megan said...

My sister-in-law just left the state and left me guardian of her house. And those expletive deleted Twilight books she's got on her shelf are calling to me in the midnight hours. I swear they are. Help me be strong.

Anonymous said...

I'd be happy to accompany you in some lawn-standing and fist-shaking. And telling kids what's what.

jadedj said...

The tats, right on top of my list...which incidentally is at least twice as long as yours. You are obviously a gentler bitter spoiled milk of inhuman unkindness than I.

libhom said...

I'm a "sensitive male," and I don't care about Twilight. I am so bored with vampires.

Margaret Benbow said...

I've heard there's a secret cult of male TWILIGHT hags--so glad (but not surprised) to learn you're not one of them!

lisahgolden said...

You crack me up. Now let me tell you about my cat....