Friday, August 21, 2009

Pop-servations

  • Hey did you know there are people who actually want to see Rebbecca Gayheart have sex? Me, I'd rather pour acid in my eyes and jab at my brain with an ice pick than watch that bug eyed murdering Kentucky redneck twit do most anything. I'll file her sex tape next to Paris Hilton's in the 'Things I'd watch only if someone shoved a shotgun up my ass and made me watch it' file.
  • Jeremy Piven says he hasn't eaten fish in 11 months and he feels great. Funny, I haven't seen a Jeremy Piven project in the same amount of time and I feel the same way.
  • John Travolta's and other 'A' list movie stars films are tanking at the box office. Hmmm, could it be because they all make crap movies today? If it's not a remake, based on a comic book, or a video game then 'A' list 'stars' don't want to be in it. It's no wonder people are staying away from that shit in droves. I'd rather watch paint dry than sit through a shitty remake of a good movie, and I'm looking at you Pelham 1,2,3.
  • Yo, people who get tattoos on your neck, once gravity really kicks in and your neck starts to sag, your now 'cool' tattoo is going to look like it's just a blob of ink. Or worse, it's going to look like you threw up and it all dribbled down your chin.
  • And ladies, one day that tramp stamp of yours that proclaims how 'Juicy' your ass is, is going to migrate south and it's going to look like you don't know how to wipe your ass.
  • Robert Zemeckis is going to remake Yellow Submarine using motion capture 3-D. Good idea Bob. Maybe one day if you remake all the shitty movies in the world in motion capture 3-D then people might actually see one of them.
  • Thank goodness Project Runway is back.
  • I'm glad Rick Bayless won Top Chef Masters. All three finalists were great chefs but week after week Bayless made the food that I most wanted to eat.
  • That Hasselback hag goes on maternity leave from The View and they get two conservative women, Megan McCain and E.D. "Terrorist Fist Pound" Hill, to fill in for her. Wow, way to stay liberal you big media outlets!

6 comments:

MommyLisa said...

Rick Bayless is so classy...watching him cook was a pleasure.

I love Hubert Keller too, but Rick was who I ultimately thought would win.

Professor Chaos said...

I'm proud to say I've never heard of Rebecca Gayheart. I have heard of Jeremy Piven, I just wish I hadn't

Wings1295 said...

HAH! Love your tattoo comments!!! Spot on, dude!

Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

Boy I loves me some airing of the grievances. Feels good doesn't it?

I agree with you after seeing 'District 9' the most anti-Hollywood movie this year. I can do without your big budget crapfests thank you very much. Same goes for Avatar. For something that was proclaimed to be so revolutionary the trailer looked pretty MEH to me.

When the quality of our celebrity sex tapes gets to this level of fail its time to just walk away.

I actually like Megan McCain even though her mother is a swamp lizard. She actually stood up to the Laura Thingram and Man Coltures and was semi-resonable on Bill Maher. Plus I would do her in a second and make her wear he pearls. Nice to see a Republican woman with a figure that doesn't resemble that of a twelve year old boy.

All the flashy tech in the world won't make a bad script good or an old idea fresh. Refer back to previous James Cameron comment

Karen Zipdrive said...

A friend of mine in highschool got a huge peacock tattooed on her hip, trailing around to her lower back.
That was more than 30 years ago and she's had at least three kids.
I'll bet it looks like a vulture now.
As for Rick Bayless, his food looked good but Hubert Keller's cuisine is French, and to me that beats the hell out of a deluxe burrito any day.
I'm gonna try to watch Project Runway, but I'm pretty sure my TVs only get Bravo and MSNBC.
Jeremy Pivin is a jerk who plays the same character no matter what he's in. I liked him best as Ellen's bland cousin.

Keith said...

I really was happy to see Rick when. He made some delicious food. Plus he seems like such a class act. A really great guy.