Saturday, June 27, 2009

The three

I never liked Ed McMahon. He was one of those people who got famous for being famous. He had no real talent besides being able to laugh at Johnny Carson's jokes. But I did love Johnny. When I was a teenager being able to stay up through the whole hour and a half of The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson made me feel like such a grown up. I detested Ed's obsequiousness but I loved Johnny's jokes, timing, delivery, and interviews. Watching Johnny meant you got to see the master of talk but you had to put up with his stupid fat friend.

McMahon's career after the Tonight Show was nothing to write home about. He was affiliated one of those scam sweepstakes companies, that awful Star Search show, and other pieces of dreck. Then in the last years of his life he claimed bankruptcy for whatever reason but I couldn't muster any sympathy for him because if you lived in the limelight all those years and you never learned to manage your money after being famous, then fuck you. He got paid handsomely for what he did but he either squandered it or was too lazy to do the due diligence he should have done with the people he trusted to manage his money.

I'm not going to miss him but I still miss Johnny like crazy.

Like all horny teens in the 1970's I had a crush on Farrah. She was everywhere, on TV, in movies, in magazines, on posters in bedrooms, which were always suspiciously close to beds for some reason. I didn't care for Charlie's Angels but I sure didn't mind seeing Farrah. I remember going to see Logan's Run and thinking I was going to hit the jackpot because she was in it. I did hit the jackpot but not because of Farrah. It was in Logan's Run that I discovered Jenny Agutter. Sure Farrah looked hot in the film but she only had what amounted to a cameo, Jenny on the other hand was not only the female lead, she also was topless in it, hubba hubba!

Farrah went on to escape her jiggly bimbo TV image somewhat with star turns in some hard hitting projects like The Burning Bed and others, but in the '90's she had to fall back on posing for Playboy and acting bat shit crazy on the Letterman show. Personally I think Ryan O'Neal kept her coked up and that's why she was so off for during that time. She fought a brave and very public battle against cancer and I'll miss her.

Michael Jackson has been dead to me for quite some time. He died after he came out with whatever he followed up Thriller with. For many years in the late 1970's and early '80's no one was bigger or had more talent than Michael. He was huge. Off the Wall and Thriller were monster albums that yielded hit after hit. I danced, very badly mind you, to many of them in discos and nightclubs during that time. I remember the night Thriller premiered on MTV. It was a snowy day in in Bristol, it snowed so much as a matter of fact that they canceled classes at my college, so a bunch of us pooled our money and we went and bought a shitload of liquor, some pot, and some beer and we went to someone's apartment to hang out and get wasted in advance of it coming on MTV that night. Things got out of hand as the day progressed into evening and propriety prevents me from sharing the exact details of what I was doing but I did stop long enough to see Thriller for the firt time and given the context of the times and what was on MTV at that time, it was amazing. Every black musician owes Michael Jackson a debt for his trailblazing work on MTV.

And then as his fame and his riches grew it all fell apart. He went from being a black singer to a white freak show.
He denied he bleached his skin and he denied that he had a special feeling towards little boys but our eyes and his actions said otherwise. His bizarre behavior turned off most people and as they began to turn off from him his behavior got stranger and stranger. He married Lisa Marie Presley, spent millions on making Neverland a magical place for little boys, and basically tried to become a white Diana Ross. His music never attained the greatness it once had, and people stopped buying his records in droves. As his adulation and fame dried up he tried to get it back but it backfired. He was found not guilty of molesting a boy but the court of public opinion had spoken and his career, despite his latest attempt at a comeback, was over.

He died full of drugs and nearly bankrupt after having been one of the most successful entertainers of my lifetime. I guess he was living proof that fame and money are not easy to handle, especially when you're as bizarre and mentally fucked up as he was.

Death comes to us all sooner or later, in Farrah's case it came too soon.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Ya. Everything you say is true. I'm not sure MJ ever had a snowball's chance in hell of becoming anything other than an over-exploited freak-show in the end - that's the sad part. So much talent, but he was never able to live like a normal human being by anyone's standards.

K.Line said...

This post is fantastic Monkey.

Margaret Benbow said...

Very clear-eyed and fair, Monkey. In the early 80's my then seven-year-old son admired Jackson's music and his gentle, magical image so much. He sent him a letter in his best printing, and enclosed some lovingly drawn pictures of Michael. Jackson never responded--Thank God.

Karen Zipdrive said...

Ed McMahon and his phony sweepstakes scheme conned my
then-elderly mother out of $11,000 and basically ruined her credit for the rest of her life.
He and Dick Clark can both kiss my family's ass.

Keith said...

Absolutely great post and spot on.

Phil said...

Well said, every bit.