When the loser Cardinals quarterback Kurt Warner last won a Superbowl he was all about thanking Jesus for his huge win and giving all the glory to his god. His wife Brenda felt so good about how much Jesus loved her and Kurt that she spread her brand of the gospel all over every one and anyone who got near her. She was spraying people with Christ like a skunk sprays you when you frighten it.
They were the poster couple for Jesus's ability to favor the team who claimed they loved him the most. I wonder what they think tonight. I'm wondering if they think Jesus loves the Steelers more. Maybe Jesus got mad at Brenda because she dropped the Susan Powter hairdo she's sporting in the above photo. Maybe Jesus didn't want her to grow her hair out and dye it blond. Maybe the big guy wants Kurt to go back to being a grocery clerk and his wife to stop being a future Cougar.
Or maybe Jesus doesn't give a shit about the Superbowl because he's too busy trying to get help to the kids who live in the grinding poverty of the slums in Mumbai. Perhaps God's son is too busy tending to the all the innocent people in Gaza who were displaced, maimed, and wounded by all bombs Israel lobbed at them. Or maybe Jesus stopped loving the Warners because he's all about the NBA now. Who knows? I'm betting Jesus is a bit fickle with his affections.
Anyway, congrats to the Steelers on a great game and a fine win. It was a hell of a game and seeing Kurt Warner so dejected after he got his ass handed to him was priceless. I'm only sorry that millions of Steeler fans will have to wake up tomorrow and come to grips with the fact that they still live in Pittsburgh. Oh well, it just goes to show you, life isn't perfect.
13 comments:
I think Jesus prefers soccer.
I like to thank Jeebus for the late flurry of scoring that brought the total over 46.5 points.
Late in the third quarter, when everything looked bleak and both offenses completely sucked eggs, I almost lost my faith, but I just told myself, "The Lord will find a way." And my faith was restored, as in days of old.
Amen.
I am not disappointed in the least that Kurt Warner went home dejected...not at all. I wouldn't want to live IN Pittsburgh...60 miles away is fine for me. I'm still elated over the win.
I read on another blog that perhaps Jesus made a beer run in the 4th quarter and left Kurt at the big moment on his own.
I could never be for the cardinals because back when the Cowboys were actually a team and actually won games, the Cardinals would always be the poop in their punch bowl.
...spraying people with Christ like a skunk... lol!
It's amazing what a micro-manager evangelicals want their God to be. My little Down's friend at the library thought he could pray McCain into office.
Jesus and God don't care about sports, period. And I'm glad you pointed out this little discrepancy. I get so annoyed seeing sports figures pointing to the sky after they make a touchdown/home run/goal whatever, as if God gave a flying you-know-what about the score!
"perhaps Jesus made a beer run in the 4th quarter and left Kurt at the big moment on his own" - I think I just peed my pants.
I look at that photo of them and I see this voice bubble:
"Jesus helped me win the Super Bowl that time but those dumb poor people who are all losing their homes brought it all on themselves".
Sorry. Sometimes I can't help but be a judgmental snark. It's how I occasionally roll.
Jeebus only watches the game for the commercials.
the commercials and troy polomalu!
i live about 4 miles from the city and i couldn't afford to live "in" the city. their idea of middle income lofts etc , well, i'd have to sell a kidney and maybe part of my liver to get into one!
BWAAAHAAAAHAAAAHAAAA!!!
At one point near in the 4th quarter, the Mrs. was shown on tv, I said, "Oh, crap, she's praying to Jesus right now."
Thanks for confirming it.
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