Hey all you union autoworkers in the Midwest, consider this an open invitation for all of you to move down to TN, KY, AL, and SC if you lose your jobs if the bridge loans fail because of the union busting Republicans in the Senate. Trust me, it will be a win/win for all of us if you do.
You see union folks, cost of living down here is way less than up north and housing is much cheaper. You can buy a mansion for what you're paying for a small house up north. And in today's economy, you will do even better than usual.
Winter down here is pretty much over by the first week or so of March so we got that going for us. And it doesn't start until around Thanksgiving, some years not until Christmas. Imagine that, a short winter and inexpensive housing.
Another thing we got going for us is our douchebag union busting US Senators. The way I figure it you can move to our states and your votes can sway the close races and we can send those asswipes packing. My idiot Senator Corker barely beat that turd in the Democratic party's punch bowl Harold Ford Jr in 2004 so your votes here in TN could easily put him out of a job, after all it's only fair if he causes you to lose your job, he should lose his.
And you could also help us get rid of the Republican majorities we have in our state houses. We could then elect union friendly Democrats and progressives and we could repeal the anti union right to work laws.
Seriously people, what have you got to lose? Did all of you see the great victory the union workers in that factory in Chicago just got? They stuck together and they got a better deal than what they were offered in the first place. Unlike your craven union leaders, the leaders of that union really know how to lead. You guys and gals could come down here and revitalize the once mighty United Mine Workers, the UAW, and union of the snake, which according to Duran Duran has been on the rise for years. Okay, I kid about that last bit, but the rest no shit, you cats could do it, I swear you could.
So leave behind the cold and snowy Midwest, leave behind the memories of the high paying jobs you used to have, and come down here and help us unionize the south and turn out those fat cat Senators who cost you your jobs and your good wages. It'll be the best thing you ever did, I swear. And you know what else? If you move down here and we become friends, we'll have some beers together and I'll cook for you. So get off those doughy Midwestern asses of yours and come on down and let's get the party started.
9 comments:
But what will we be left with here in the Midwest if all those Union workers leave? I don't even want to think about it! Besides, some people actually like winter. It kills all the bugs, for one thing.
it amazes me how little is said about 1) that shelby and corker and demint are in states that have FOREIGN auto companies producing cars
2) how republicans are chomping at the bit to bust the unions -- like Reagan did in 1981 with PATCO. it is burn down the village to save the village.
I was iffy about the auto bailout until I heard the GOP killed the bill.
Now I'm all for it.
Don't underestimate the union of the snake, man.
What a nice idea, and so sweet to welcome them!
Why don't more people turn to Duran Duran at times like these?
Don't forget to tell them about boiled peanuts. I love southern boiled peanuts!
How can they refuse? Seriously, though, great points. Anybody who values the right to take a bathroom or lunch break, or the right to compensation if you're injured at work should thank the labor movement.
I read this morning that Senators and your Congressmen are getting a $5,000 raise on January 1st. Jezo.
I've been working for the same wage for two years. Where's my raise?
Shhhhhh! Don't tell them about the Volkswagon plant opening in Chattanooga, dude. Those are OUR jobs;) Then when the German management team comes to fix our underproducing plant, we'll make the movie Gung Ho II. It's a classic dying for a sequel!
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