Monday, November 12, 2007

Let's go back in time...

...to hear the predictions about the future from Michelle De Nostradamus.
Bon jour everyone! Welcome back to 1965! We use lots of exclamation points here in the murky almost sepia toned past!! Don't be afraid, but do hang on and check out some predictions I made years ago. Let's see how they turned out, shall we? Of course we shall or I wouldn't be in this blog post!!

In 1965 I predicted: That an unpopular President of the United States would step down during the middle of an unpopular war that was waged so that munitions companies could clear out their inventories. Turns out I went one for two on that one. But maybe I'll get lucky and Bush will resign or get impeached soon.


In 1965 I predicted: Men would one day walk on the Moon, marry one another, and yet still be insensitive bastards. I got two out of three.


In 1965 I predicted: The rich powerful countries of the world would eradicate poverty and hunger in the poorest countries. I had no idea they'd do it through war, neglect, and multi national corporate oppression.


In 1965 I predicted: That Richard Chamberlain would father a child with Barbara Streisand. I'm allowed one miss. Which is one more Miss than Mr. Chamberlain had, zing!


In 1965 I predicted: That United States citizens would have universal health care for all by the year 2006. Turns out I was right, well if you count only members of Congress, the President, and all the members of his cabinet as citizens.


In 1965 I predicted: That aliens would come to the USA. If you count all the damn illegal Belgians and Albanians who slip into the USA over the Mexican border then I was right!


In 1965 I predicted: That affordable housing would be found for all people who want it. If you count cardboard boxes as houses then I got this one right too!


In 1965 I predicted: That monkeys would finally reproduce the works of Shakespeare on those typewriters we gave them. Those darn simian writers did me one better, it turned out they came up with blogs like this one! And this one.

However in 1965 I had no idea what the hell a blog was. Sacre bleu, my head lamp that I use to peer into the future is giving me a head ache. I must retreat back to the past and have wild promiscuous sex with many sexy young men and women while I gobble up fine gourmet food and wine. Adieu!

6 comments:

Dr. Zaius said...

"In 1965 I predicted: That affordable housing would be found for all people who want it."

According to the Bush administration, the homeless just don't want affordable housing bad enough.

pissed off patricia said...

Okay, the pic scared me so much I had trouble reading the post. Ask the bush administration about afordable housing, expecially for vets, and they'll tell you there are plenty of cardboard boxes to go around.

dguzman said...

Hey, some of those cardboard boxes are really big--like the ones for all those fancy new 2,000-cubic-ft refrigerators or industrial stoves that rich white people buy! It's like McCardboardMansion out there, folks!

Anonymous said...

1965 was a great year! For births and Ford Mustangs.

Great for predictions? Meh. Unless of course you want healthcare for all Americans (who are Congressional members), love living in cardboard boxes and find poverty to be just another lifestyle choice.

Distributorcap said...

you are the new Jeane Dixon.......

another Dr M Masterpiece

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Dr. Zaius-The terrorists win when we don't want housing bad enough.

POP-Don't be scared of that pic, she's harmless.

D Cup-So it's all good then by Bush's standards.

Dcap-Thank you sir. And thanks for not calling me the new Kreskin.