I just got back from my cardiologist appointment in Knoxville, I have to go every six months for a check up to placate the douchebags at Met Life Insurance, my last employer had a disability policy with them and lucky for me they did or I would have been without income for the year and a half it took me to get my SSDI benefits. No worries on this trip which was good news, Dr. Hoadley told me I seem to be doing well and he says that he's glad to see me coming back in these six month increments because that means he's been doing a good job of keeping me alive.He and I have a funny doctor patient relationship. He was the cardiologist on duty the night I had my heart attack and he was the one who put the stent in me that night. He also was the guy who recommended I get bypass surgery and despite my sometimes bad behavior towards the medical people in Baptist Hospital in Knoxville, he's still my cardiologist.
At one time I pissed him off and he told me to find another cardiologist closer to my home, it's an hour and a half drive to his office from our home, but we've since smoothed things out and Sparky and I still make the trip every six months to see him. After he found out I was one of those patients who reads up on his disease he treats me with much more respect than he would some idiot who never modifies their behavior or lifestyle after a life changing heart attack. He also found out I used to do improv comedy and so he likes to joke around with me when I go see him. Here's a snippet of our conversation in his office today:
Dr. Hoadley: You need to find a personal physician so you can see them in emergencies.
Me: Yeah, yeah, yeah, I will. I promise.
Dr. H: You also need to have one because it's a long drive up here and something may happen to you, no let me rephrase that, something will happen to you eventually...
Me: Like?
Dr. H: Something like an accident or you could get cancer. So that's why...
Me: Well, odds are one of us is going to get cancer at some point.
Dr. H: Most likely it'll be you. (Laughing)
Me: Geez, you need to work on that bedside manner. You're a real barrel of laughs and full of bad news today.
Dr. H: (Laughing) Well, as long as I'm giving you bad news, you're ugly too.
Me: Sez you baldy. (Pointing to my still hair covered head) See? I still have my hair. Oh, what happened to yours? Why it all fell out! Nah, nah, nah.
He's no Henny Youngman but the guy does have some comedic game and he's a nice guy so you can see why I don't mind driving an hour and a half to see him instead of finding some quack around here in Johnson City.
Unfortunately, almost everyone else in his office sucks ass. There receptionists are a group of women who Sparky and I have dubbed The Coven due to their rudeness and witchy bitchy behavior. They scream out people's names and have no problem shouting out personal info about patients if they like. They seem to think that because the majority of their patients are elderly that all people who come into the office are heard of hearing. The gal who took my blood today also suffered from thinking I was deaf as well. I was standing not four feet from her when she shouted my name and demanded that I follow her. I asked to to not shout at me and she seemed to think I was joking. She said loudly, "I hope I don't have to shout at you." When I told her I was not deaf and that I would appreciate it if she used her "indoor voice" when speaking to me she finally got the picture.
But having a doctor who will joke around with me while he makes sure I stay alive makes me keep going back to Baptist Hospital in Knoxville every six months.
After we left with my good cardiac report and a promise to schedule a cardio stress test later, Sparky and I went and had lunch at the Gourmet Market on Kingston Pike. It was meh, nothing special but we enjoy browsing in the kitchen and cooking utensil part of the place. After that we hightailed it to one of our favorite Knox-Vegas haunts, McKay's Used Books and CD's where I picked up a couple of travel and food related books and a Kirsty MacColl CD and Sparky bought herself some novels by Peter Mayle and Anne Tyler as well as a travel book that I'm sure I'll end up reading someday as well.
All in all not a bad day and I sure am glad I'm home now so I can blog like crazy and read all your wonderful blogs too.
11 comments:
I have an uncle who is one of those idiots. Had the heart attack, had multiple bypass surgeries. Never changed his ways or modified his diet. That old bastard has been barely alive for the last 40 years but he's buried most of the folks in our family. I wondered why my aunt kept shoving bacon down his throat, until I realized she was just trying to kill his miserable ass.
i read the part about your lunch as "it was meth, nothing special" and wondered how, exactly, that fit in with your heart care regimen.
i was, of course, hallucinating.
glad you're doing the work.
Click my heels and jump for joy, you got a clean bill of health from Dr. McCoy. I think you keep your doctor down in Knoxville because you just like visiting your old stompin' grounds. Glad to hear your doin' well, Monkerstein. Keep on bloggin'!
Jeebus man, take care of that heart! I'm glad you got a good doctor, one you can talk to. That counts for a lot, I think. Your statement about getting more respect when it was clear you were reading up on your condition is so true; I've seen that a number of times.
As for those people who don't change their habits? I remember my first trip to Las Vegas, wandering around in the Westward Ho around 3am. I watched an older, larger woman sitting on a Rascal scooter playing a slot machine. She had a nasal canula hooked up to an oxygen tank on the back of her scooter, and she was sipping what looked like some kind of blended whiskey and soda drink from her cupholder. Then she hit something on the machine, leaned back, disconnected her canula--and lit up a smoke.
Keep on.
Wow, and I was going to blog about my 40 year physical...I got a tetnaus shot and a flu shot and I'm complaining. You are a real man, Monkey Muck...live your life and fuck everything else.
Well...except people you love, be nice to them,.
Kirby-Some guys have all the luck.
Kelsi-That's not a bad idea, meth for lunch.
Anonymous-Can and will do. Leave a name next time or I'll delete your comment.
Bubs-I'm taking better care of it now than I ever have, thanks for the reminder tho!
Kim-Will do sugar booger.
That doctor needs a swift kick in the stethascope. I mean, it's okay to be funny, but telling someone they're ugly is never funny.
You had a heart attack? A stent?! Geeze! Glad you're doing okay!
Glad you got a clean bill of health. I must say one of the things I miss about Knoxville is McKays. I have contemplated stopping on my way north sometime to purge my self of some books. Take care MVM.
Kristi-He was only kidding. I'm glad he feels like he can kid around some with me.
SEan-No one's gladder than me old buddy. Oh by the way they moved McKays. It's now a super used book/cd/dvd/video game store. It's in the old Rodgers Caddilac dealership showroom.
Monkey- I also suggest the next time that the nurse yells in your hear telling her, "That hurts my ears, can you please lower your voice." It seems to work for 4 years old, so why not some witch.
i just re-read that it was supposed to be yelled in your ear, not hear.
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