Sunday, July 15, 2007

True Employment Tales!

Back when I used to sell for this company


I made at stop at one of my regular customers shops. After I wrote down what I thought they needed that day I asked one of the tire jockeys if he knew if they needed anything special besides the various sizes and types of wheel weights, valve stems, and tire repair materials I had already written on my order pad. He said, "I need a valve core remover."

(This is what a valve core remover looks like.)

He went on, "But I need one where the remover is incest in the handle."

After I did a double take he sheepishly said, "Oh wait. Incest. Isn't that where you fuck your sister?"

I said, "Yep. I think you mean you want a recessed valve core remover (that's one where the remover is inside the handle).

"Uhh, yeah, that's what I want. I want one of those." He paused for a few seconds as I grinned and tried to not laugh out loud. "Yeah, I want a recessed valve core remover and just so you know, I don't want to fuck my sister."

6 comments:

Katie Schwartz said...

you also don't want to fuck his sister if she's as short bus as he is.

ok, point blank, I screamed. I SCREAMED from this post. howled and peed a little. oh my god, it's so wrong.

an incest valve. that sounds like a pussy, don't it?! imagine some chick referring to her flange as her incest valve?! dude... DUUUUDE.

Anonymous said...

Your next story has got to be about when you were a very non-thirsty vacuum salesman for the damned.....

Anonymous said...

Good thing he didn't want to fuck his sister - he would've needed a purchase order for that.

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Katie-His sister probably looked like him only she had tits. Ewww.

Covert-All in good time my man, all in good time.

D Cup-The purchase order number would have been BR549.

NotSoccer Mom said...

oh my god i almost peed in my pants laughing.

thanks for the chuckle this monday morning.

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Notsoccer-My pleasure.