In other Republican news Mike Huckabee hit the bricks hard in search of votes and cash. Here he is in Kansas looking for votes and looking dapper.
His lovely wife Janet spent the weekend speaking in tongues and scaring small children.
And finally future historical footnote George W. Bush claimed that he would be an asset to John McCain's campaign and that Barack Obama was not ready to be President. Given Bush's track record of truth telling, the entire nation took what he said with a gazillion grains of salt.
In the Democratic Party race former President Bill Clinton was in Abingdon, VA, which is about 30 miles from me, over the weekend campaigning for his wife. I didn't go see him but everyone told me he looked just as good as ever.
And now, I saved the best for last:
Barack kicked Hillary's ass, shoot, I mean, he swept all the primaries and caucuses this weekend. He won every single one of them. Every. One. He lost none. I think it's time for Howard Dean to tell Hillary to bow out and let the man with the momentum run unopposed. Rock on Barack. Win in November, yes we can.
And I assure you it is because of personal reasons and not because I sexually harassed her. Let me state here and now that I did not sexually harass Ms. David at any time and I most definitely did not harass her at the latest Monkey Party Convention in Boulder, Colorado.
My team of attorneys has repeatedly told me that just because I got into Ms. David's hotel room without her consent while she was shopping and that just because I was in my undies when she came back that those activities in and of themselves do not constitute sexual harassment. So there, nah nah nah. Ms. David is going back to working full time with the NRDC and to help Nobel Prize Laureate Al Gore work to stem the tide of climate change. She'll be missed by one and all here at the Monkerstein campaign!
Whew, Dr. Monkey this place is hell hole of human rights violations and it's not a democracy at all. It's controlled by the greedy bastards that we call the House of Saud and by the right wing Islamist religious police. Women have no rights, can't vote, or freely mix and mingle where they please. The young people hate the strict controls the government and the religious police put on them and couple that with the extreme difference between the haves and the have nots, and you've got one explosive cauldron of anti Western hate and Islamist extremism boiling up. It's no wonder that Bin Laden and most all of the 9/11 hijackers came from this country, if I lived here all the time I'd hate Bush and America with a burning passion too. So, no, there's no democracy been spread over here at all.
Nope. It's still controlled by one royal family and a bunch of foreign oil companies. No democracy here, lots of sand yes, but democracy no.
Despite what people may think of their current President, he was elected democratically in a free and fair election. His administration was almost overthrown by coup that had the blessing of Bush but thank goodness the people of Venezuela took to the streets and tossed that bunch of traitors out. There may be trouble here though since they do have a shitload of oil under them in Venezuela. I'd keep my eyes peeled for any signs of invasion by Bush/Cheney.
Democracy is alive and well here. They just elected Daniel Ortega as their President. Remember him? He was one of those Sandinista's that Reagan hated so much. You remember the Sandinstas don't you? They were the ones who overthrew their US backed oppressor Antonio Samoza, who incidentally died in a hail of gunfire in Paraguay after he was deposed. There's not much oil here so I doubt Bush cares much about Nicaragua.
Haiti recently had a Presidential election and as usual the Bush backed interests in that small impoverished country almost screwed the people yet again. But the brave people of Haiti found evidence of election fraud when the Bush backed greedy business owners and army tried to steal the election. It's a constant battle between the corporate interests and the democracy loving working classes of Haiti.
Here's a photo of one of the pro war, or as they should be called, pro senseless murder and mayhem supporters. Notice how he wants us to "stay the course" and by doing so we will in his small mind "support the troops." Notice also how old he is, he's obviously too old to go fight himself, and if he did go fight, then I'm damn sure he'd want out of that hell hole after about 5 seconds into his first fire fight. That is if he survived the first five seconds of that fire fight. Oh well, it's all "stay the course" as long as it's not his ass on that battlefield. 
Those scheming Quaker vixens 
So did this one. Man, this sitting crap better not be catching on or there may be trouble!
"Git up ya damn dirty liberuls and hippies. Ya'll ain't fit ta breathe the air them soldiers ain't over here breathin'! Ahm gonna wave my penis, oops, Ah means mah gun, at ya!"
This dude is the artistic genius who made that huge puppet of our Chickenhawk in Chief. He's got my vote for artist of the decade.
Sandra introduced the band du jour, ladies and gentlemen, the 
The band has a trippy dreamy country-esque rock and roll sound that reminded me of a less somnambulant Cowboy Junkies. And they also had a cooler than thou, cuter than anything, lead singer. Once again my photography skills are not doing this woman any justice because she is cute, cute, cute. And a damn fine singer and guitarist as well.
Here's the rest of the Feral Throes. These dudes worked it like a rented mule. Yay local bands! Yay local bands who play anti war rallies! Yay Feral Thores! If you're in Asheville, Johnson City, or anywhere where these kids play I recommend you check them out. 
After a few numbers by the kids in the band we had our first speaker, the 
After Senor Shuck left the mic the Feral Throes came back on to play a few more numbers and then after them was our next speaker. He is the guy in the far right of this photo in the shades. His name is Jason H. and he's an Iraq war vet. Unlike those denture dudes on the rice burners, Jason actually went to war and thank goodness he came home alive. He served in Baghdad and other places in Iraq. He was in a National Guard medical unit that is based here in Johnson City that got called up. He's back now and he's out of the army all together! Yay Jason! He spoke for a few moments about how the shame he felt over having to wear the same uniform as the liar Gen. Petraus. He also spoke about meeting Iraqi citizens who told him that until the US invaded that they never had to worry about IED's and Al Qaeda and how they never had to worry about their kids getting killed while walking to school or about getting shot by US soldiers for simply driving down their streets. I like Jason a lot and I'm glad he's out and that he can speak out with out losing any of his benefits. As you can see the ladies also like Jason. Go Jason, go.
The final speaker was Joseph F., you remember him from the previous post. Joseph has a doctorate in Political Science, is a Greek native, speaks about four billion languages, does emergency surgery in a pinch, has mastered the black arts of dentistry, and has forgotten more than you mortals will ever know. He's also one of the masterminds behind Democracy Now! Tri-Cities, which is a progressive group dedicated to keeping Democracy Now! on our local NPR station and which is a clearing house for local progressive groups to network with one another. I swear if Joseph is not Sec. General of the UN before he dies then there is no justice in this world. And if I could, I'd have his babies. My man Joseph gave a fiery speech about taking back our country from the bastards who are ruining it, about ending the war, and about how we all could be better activists. I was in awe of him, the dude threw down like nobody's business. That's why I like him so much, he's smart, he's progressive, and he's fun to be around. Vote Joseph for President of the World!
The guy holding the Bush with Mickey Mouse ears sign is Keith. He's father of the two good looking lads in the previous post.
Ron Paul supporters (yes, it's true, Ron Paul supporters joined us today),
Dogs Against Bush,
local Muslims, 
Parasols for Peace and Justice,
Cute Moms Against The War,
Wall Sitting Coeds for Positive Change,
and the gals from The Peace Loving Tye Dyes.
We also had some real celebs at our not so little event. Frank Zappa came back from the dead to be at our rally/march. Those dead years have been kind to Frank, haven't they?
Lily Allen dropped by for a bit. Or was it Parker Posey?
And oddly enough, the V for Vendetta dude showed up. Turns out he's quite the womanizer. Check him out hitting on Travis's wife. Yo, V, that shit ain't cool man. You had your shot with Natalie Portman, leave Travis's wife alone.
By the end of the afternoon we found out we had managed to put on the biggest anti war protest in this area since the Vietnam war. Not bad for a small town in one of the most heavily Republican areas of the country. I hope we can build on this positive event and that we can draw more and more people out to protest and to stand up to Bush and the corporate media bullies. I also hope that you folks will agitate in your areas because if we had this big a turn out in east Tennessee then imagine what you could do in your area.