Girls Gone Wild wouldn't have her...

...so the Today Show hired Jenna "And tonic" Bush. This is just the sort of thing I was expecting from the liberal media, damn them.

Here's Don and Judy with a joke for you

Don, did you hear about the trouble Jenna Bush had on the first night of her honeymoon with her new husband?

Nope, why don't you tell me all about it Judy.Well Don, her new hubby was very nervous and shy about having sex, I'm sure he was a virgin wink wink nudge nudge, and he got so flustered that he grabbed his cellphone, ran to the bathroom, and called his mother for advice on what to do next.

What did she tell him?Shhhhh, not in front of the negro. I'll wait until he finishes serving us then I'll finish. Hurry up Judy, finish that joke, I'm about to fall asleep over here.

Well Don, his mother told him to calm down and go back into the bedroom and put the hardest thing he could find in the wettest hole he could find. She told him to leave his phone on so she could listen in and tell if he was doing things properly. Well, the next thing she heard was a big splash and a crashing sound. She screamed, "Son! What was that noise?" Her son came back on the phone and he said he had thrown a bowling ball into the toilet. Hahahahaha. Isn't that a hoot Don? The hardest ting he could find was a bowling ball and the wettest hole he could find was the toilet! Hahahaha. Isn't that a hoot Don?

Don?

Don did you fall asleep before I finished the joke? You rascal, you did! Well, I'll show you. I'll go boink the negro waiter while you sleep. I'll teach you to ignore me!"