I hope this isn't an April Fool's joke

Anna Paquin has announced she's bisexual.
Millions of men's feverish fantasies about her went into overdrive as soon as they heard the news.
Many men, and some women, are hoping there is a sex tape of Anna and one of her female lovers floating around out there somewhere.
I'm holding out hope that there's one of her and Scar Jo.
And while I'm at it, I'm also hoping that the both of them are interested in doing a sex tape with me. What? I've been working out lately.
And I'm sure Sparky would be totally cool with me being in a sex tape with Scar Jo and Anna. What? Stop laughing. It could happen.

I really shouldn't be telling you this yet but...

...it's too good not to pass along to you. I'm on the short list to be the new Doctor on Dr. Who. I told them that if I get cast then I want Anna Paquin as my companion. We make a pretty good team don't you think?

Did you know...

...that Anna Paquin is 25? When I heard that I was all like, "Whew, now I don't feel like such a dirty old man for having a crush on her."