"I'd say Trump is a piece of shit, but that's being disrespectful to shit. At least shit serves a purpose, it fertilizes crops and helps food grow."
"My mouth was open like this and he tried to put something in it. I didn't see it because my eyes were closed but I remember it was small and round and it tasted like flop sweat and pickle juice."
"We tried using all the seduction techniques Donald Trump has used and all it got us was a shitload of restraining orders and some slaps from some women."
"He tried to grab my boobs but his tiny hands couldn't fit around them. He's such a weak ass loser."
"We like pie."
"Trump cologne, the scent of failure in a bottle."