Friday, October 5, 2012

New 2012 endorsements

 Three out of four of the Stapleton quadruplets are endorsing President Obama and one out of four of them secretly fears she was adopted.

 The 1973 University of Wisconsin at White Water Student Swingers Club has endorsed Rand Paul and Aqua Buddha.

 The Future Alcoholic Housewives Of America has endorsed you taking them out for supper tonight seeing as how they're too tipsy to cook.  And it's the least you could do what with all that overtime you've been putting in lately and how you've been ignoring them for weeks you selfish bastard.  And never forget, you're the reason they drink, all those promises you made them before you got married and not one of them has been kept.  You know what, on second thought, forget supper out, they're just gonna have a fifth of scotch and a pint of whatever it is they've got in the glove-box in the car.  And you, you'll have to make do with whatever that hussy of yours at 7-11 can whip up for you.

 The Haven't Touched a Naked Boobie Club has endorsed a Michele Bachmann and Sarah Palin make out session as long as they get to watch it happen.

 Skip Diebold, Channel 27's most farty meteorologist, has endorsed Romney. 
The League of Ordinary Ladies has endorsed not endorsing anyone because they don't want to force their views on anyone.

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