Wednesday, June 23, 2010

The cheesy adventures of old Indiana Jones

I watched the latest Indiana Jones movies a few minutes ago and I can sum it up in one picture:
Yes, it's like all the rest of the Indiana Jones movies, it's exciting, full of adventure, and fast paced. But unlike all the rest, this one is cheesy as hell.

  • First off Harrison Ford is ninety something now and he shows it in this movie. There is not enough Vaseline they can smear on the camera lens to make him look younger.
  • Second, do they seriously expect us to believe Shoo Fly LeBeef is going to fill the ancient shoes of Harrison Ford? Nope. Not hardly.
  • Thirdly, Cate Blanchett is a fine villain but her accent drops in and out like drifter at a soup kitchen. You're a classically trained actress Cate, suck it up and keep your accent.
  • Fourthly, inter dimensional beings? Really? That how you end this edition of this franchise? With inter dimensional beings flitting off to somewhere?
  • And finally, I'm guessing John Hurt got tired of playing intelligent erudite characters and he took this gig so he could play the babbling village idiot. Well played Mr. Hurt. I smell lifetime Academy Award in your future after this performance!
This film isn't bad, so much as it's kind of annoying.


Anonymous said...

I've always found Harrison Ford supremely repulsive.

Wings said...

I thought it was good. Not the greatest in the series, but has the action, adventure and fun we want in an Indiana Jones flick.

On a side note, I have a paperback of one of the Indy adventures to read on vacation in a few weeks. Can't wait! They are (usually) pre-Raiders stories, so we meet a younger Indy. Fun stuff!

GETkristiLOVE said...

I thought the second one with the little kid and the stupid screaming wench was pretty cheesy as well. Thanks Dr. M for the review. I'll watch it the next time I want to be annoyed.

Blueberry said...

I *loved* the first one, thought the next 2 were OK, and this one should not have been made. I like HF but do think he's way too old to be Indy, and the movie was just stupid - and annoying too, agree with that.

Ricky Shambles said...

IJ4 was so awful they should have marketed it with those 3 characters. How do you go from documented archeology and reasonable human mythos to Coast to Coast with George Noory?

And Fifth before your final: Where in God's name did they find the rock to lift to find Karen Allen? I haven't seen her since Scrooged! My own father after seeing the movie said he thought she'd been living in the box they put the Ark in since then, without sustenance.

Saddest? IMDB says she's had work since Scrooged. Ugh.

Terrible and as embarrassing and eye-watering as watching a reality show where the saddest mess of a group shuffles through her pockets and says "I wrote a poem...."

Turn it off. Make it stop.