Thursday, May 27, 2010

Stupid shit people have said to me (part 1)

I'll admit it, I get around. And when I'm around people talk to me. Unfortunately for me sometimes they say some really stupid shit. So the stuff I haven't forgotten, either on purpose or not, I'll try to share with you from time to time.

Doesn't that make you happy?

I knew it would!

A girl I once dated asked me what I thought the strongest muscles in the human body were. I thought for a moment and then I answered, the jaw muscles. She shook her head and said I was wrong. She then informed me that the strongest muscles were the biceps because they were the 'power' muscles that people used when punching other people.

I told her that the amount of force used by the jaw muscles when chewing or ripping food was way more than that generated by the biceps. She rolled her eyes and said, "But you cain't hit nobody with your jaw muscles, now can you?"

I sighed heavily and then changed the subject.

We broke up a few weeks later.


Wings said...

I think you were right, on both counts there, Doc.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

I wonder whatever happened to that girl?

DrGoat said...

Teabag mentality.

Anonymous said...

I look forward to the rest of this series. Of course, for the rest of the day I'm going to be thinking of what the stupidest thing anyone has ever said to me could possibly be.

Brian Busby said...

I would've guessed the gluteal muscles. I wonder what she would've thought of that.

Ricky Shambles said...

Dumbest thing anyone ever said to me (mingles with BS stories, but...) was this guy I worked with, said his grandmother's basement was flooded and a fire started in a box but when the fire department got there, they couldn't put it out because it was underwater.

I still can't mentally put my head around that story, why the coworkers who were actually listening (I was eaves dropping) were like "wow" and why I didn't go uptop-cube and just give him a drop-ceiling elbow crash for bullshit.

PENolan said...

You may not be able to hit anyone with your jaw muscles, but you can bite the living shit out of them. Shit. That bitch must've never been in a real fight.

Liberality said...

some of the stupidest things I hear I say to myself :P