See if you can spot the difference between when white folks demonstrate peacefully and when black folks demonstrate peacefully

When white folks do it, more often than not they're doing to uphold white supremacy, when black folks do it, they're doing it to expand freedom and civil rights to more people.

Old white people know what's best for black folks in Baltimore

"They just need to calm down and do what the police tell them.  I do, and I never have any problems."

"Those thugs need Jesus, right wing Jesus.  You know, the one who hates gays and loves private enterprise."

"If they'd get a job and stay away from white women, things would be fine."

"Yes, I want those muscle bound taut hard bodied men with huge bulges to stay away from me, especially when I'm naked and fresh out of the shower, which is usually around 9 in the morning.  I'm at 836 Oakland, so make sure all you good looking horny young black men stay away from me and my house, wink wink."

"Are they banging on about racism again?  Isn't letting them have a black president enough?  Fuck, we let them have the NBA too.  They need to stop whining."

"I say we mix them all a nice martini or give them a swig of malt liquor and they go their to vacation homes to calm down."

"I suppose we could stop treating them as second class citizens and reinvest in their communities. Hahahahaha, I nearly said the shit with a straight face."

"Stop bothering me, I'm binge watching Fringe on Netflix."

There goes the neighborhood, or How I learned to stop worrying and love the Blacks

It started slowly, first a few Black families moved into the neighborhood but quickly more and more of them came. 

People in the neighborhood didn't know what to think at first.  They'd heard the stories about how the Blacks were lazy, shiftless, prone to violence, into drugs, liked to drink, and were promiscuous.  But as time went along most of us saw the Blacks were normal folks, just like us.

They held down jobs, some owned their own businesses, they raised families, and had their problems, just like all other families did.  It was pretty common to see them out riding bikes, going to the park, and enjoying life when they could, and enduring things when life was bad.

 The Blacks celebrated Christmas and other holidays.  But some didn't.  It was no big deal.

Turns out the rumors of the Blacks being dirty and smelly weren't true.  Some of the Blacks kept their houses and families cleaner than others in the neighborhood did.

The Blacks didn't like the cold weather much but they did like New Year's Eve and a few even learned to put up with it and do stuff like skating.

And of course some of the neighborhood boys fell really hard for the Black girls.  But when some local girls fell for some of the Black boys, a lot of the folks in the neighborhood who said publicly that they had no problem or beef with the Blacks got out of sorts if their daughters dated any of the Black males.  But as time went on, even that become more and more accepted.

The Blacks always pitched in on neighborhood clean up day and they went out of their way to help out neighbors who needed it in times of crisis.

But sometimes at night, someone from outside of the neighborhood liked to throw rocks at the homes of the Blacks, and toilet paper the trees of some of the Black families in our neighborhood.  The vandals would scream at the Blacks and tell them to go back to where they came from.

 That kind of behavior drove some of the Blacks to drink.

And then some of the neighborhood folks started hiding their valuables when they knew the Blacks were coming over, which was kind of stupid because no one really wanted to steal their mingy shit anyway.

Then some uptight business owners didn't like that the presence of the Black families in the neighborhood caused outsiders to come in and destroy stuff, they began to resent the Blacks and some stopped serving them in restaurants and stores.

But that didn't stop the Blacks from continuing to move in our neighborhood.  In fact, so many moved in and made friends and intermarried with the other families that they became the majority and any business that didn't serve them soon went out of business.  And we started a neighborhood watch programs that quickly dealt with anyone that had ideas of messing with the Blacks and the rest of our neighborhood.

So considering everything, it's been great having the Blacks in our neighborhood.

It's time for 'Breakfast with the Whites'!

Today the Whites talk about blacks and Ferguson MO.

"I just can't see why those negroes are protesting so much over there in Ferguson.  Sure, a kid got gunned down by the cops, but that's to be expected in black neighborhoods.  It's kind of like their version of 'survival of the fittest,' those people who are fast and wily enough to escape the cop led slaughter, they get to pass their genes on.  That's just science right there."

 "Those people need to register to vote instead of looting and smoking pot.  They need a chance to vote for the white conservative Republican of their choice in the next election.  I'm sure which ever one they elect, he'll do what he thinks Jesus would do to them."

 "We had a negro in our house once.  As you can see, I'm still spraying away his germs."

"I've got to finish my breakfast and grow up to be big and strong and maybe bag a dusky skinned negress with large breasts and a big ol' booty.  I'm only nine, but I'm already infected with jungle fever, if you know what I mean.  I'll tell people I'm mating the black women because I feel sorry about how my ancestors treated them during the time slavery was legal."  

Jell-O's dark secret

Negroes love Jell-O.  It's a little known fact.

"It's true, we all love Jell-O," says Tyrone McToken.  "And we only love Jell-O brand gelatin.  Don't come at us with some cheap imitation or some bitch ass Knox gelatin."

Mr. and Mrs. Ronald Danninger love Jell-O so much they used it in all the dishes at their wedding dinner.

 Many white people often prepare an abundance of Jell-O related dishes just in case some Negro friends drop by. 

 "We'd never dream of going to a dinner party at our Negro friend's houses without an attractive Jell-O dish to share.  We're pretty sure they'd bust a cap in our asses if we didn't," say Henry and June Hansen.

"As you know we white folks do whatever we can to make our Negro friends and neighbors happy and content, so in that spirit I'm teaching my son how to make a decorative Jell-O dessert.  We've got to keep those Negroes pacified one way or another don't we?"