Saturday, December 22, 2007

Some Guy's Secret Santa Strikes

Grab that cup of hot chocolate Chris and get ready for your Secret Simian Santa gift explosion! Go on man, take a sip and get ready for the parade of holiday goodness.

We know you love to ski, so we got you and your girlfriend Megan this fabulous international ski package! You'll start in Switzerland where the Swiss are never neutral about great skiing. You'll also enjoy a myriad of cuckoo cuckoo clocks and things made of chocolate. Enjoy all the down hill Alpine skiing you like because when it's over you kids are jetting off down under!
That's right Chris, you and Megan will be flying to New Zealand where we're going to force you both to do some eXXXtreme stunt skiing! We'll laugh and thrill as you and she do all sorts of stunts and tricks as the locals shout funny antipodean catch phrases at you. Peter Jackson of Lord Of The Rings fame may even show up, you never know!After New Zealand you'll be shoved aboard a pirate ship that will drop you off in Japan where you and Megan will be whisked off to Sapporo, site of the 1972 Winter Olympics, there you'll both be made to learn ski jumping. If you survive, then we've got one more ski stop for you lovely South America! That's right Chris, we're going to let Megan be kidnapped by narco-terrorists high in the Andes and you'll have to use your skiing daring do to rescue her! It's going to be a blast, we promise.

After all skiing you're going to need to warm up and unwind, so we've arranged to have a hot tub ready for you and Megan in intoxicating Panama City, Panama!
You may have to share it with a few folks, but who cares? It'll be relaxing!

Merry CHRISTMAS!!!!!


Jay Allbritton said...

Hey Man, the bog's looking great. Merry Christmas and thanks for the constant flow of great material.

Jay Allbritton said...

bog? Ha!

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Hey, I thought there was a zillion dollar limit on these! You cheated.

Some Guy said...

Holy Crap! This is one gift I will definitely NOT be exchanging! I've always wanted to ski in the southern hemisphere. Although, I might have to ask those hot tub inhabitants to scram so Megan and I can have some alone time.

Thanks, Dr. Monkey! I hope you and your family have a wonderful holidays and I look forward to another year of your madness! Best wishes!

GETkristiLOVE said...

Most excellent. I wonder if Chris has ever crapped in Switzerland... nay, he would have blogged about it for sure.

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Station Agent-Thank you for reading my friend. And happiest of holidays to you and yours!

Barb-I'm allowed to cheat on gifts. I am Mr. Christmas after all.

Chris-I'm glad you like your gift. Happy holidays to you and Megan as well. And thanks for reading my blog!


Crayons said...

You've got the voice down perfectly. It's the voice that narrates the lives of mainstream Americans. Very very funny. The group photo made me laugh so hard that my glass of excellent Syrah almost tipped over and crashed.

Blueberry said...

MERRY CHRISTMAS to you!!! That is one evil-looking hot tub. Here's wishing those folks plenty of hot water in the New Year.

A tip of the Heineken to you.