True Employment Tales

Back when I worked for Myers Tire Supply they sent out a memo to us sales guys to tell us to make sure we called Meineke shops in our territory. I had three of them in Knoxville so one day soon after getting the memo I stopped at one on Kingston Pike. I asked to see the owner and this guy who looked like James Coco but with a bigger belly came out of the office. He said in a thick New York accent, "I'm da owna. I'm Sal. Who da fuck are you?" I told him who I was and who I was with and I started showing him what all Myers had for sale. He was one of those people I took to right off. He was a funny guy but he had a great head for his business. He didn't buy anything from me that first time I called on him and he kept putting me off for after four or five sales calls but one day he finally broke down and bought something from me.


He and I were out in the shop area and he asked me if we carried accessories for a brake washing machine that he had. I told him we did and he said, "Youse guys got the donkey dicks too?" I gave him a funny look and he said, "Ain't you eva seen a donkey dick?" "Nope, I never have Sal," I said.

He grabbed me by the hand and led me to his machine and he pulled out what he was calling a donkey dick. It turned out it was a long tubular filter that was about as big around and twice as long as a roll of cookie dough.

I looked in my product catalog and I found the filter/donkey dick right away. He said, "How much? And don't bust my balls or break my bank either." I went out and looked up the price and I wallked back in and told him. He thought for a minute and then he gave me a sly smile. "Ok, I'll take it. In fact, send me three, one for each one of my shops." I smiled, thanked him for the order, and I shook his big beefy hand. I turned to walk out and he called after me. He said, "You know what? From now on I'm gonna get all my donkey dick from you." I started to laugh and so did his employees, it took him a second to realize what he said but then he started laughing too. He said, "Yep, I'm gonna like gettin' dat big fat donkey dick from you." Then he blew me a kiss before I left and I blew him one back. He was one of my all time favorite customers.